More Cool-Looking Characters

Well, I’ve been putting this off long enough I figure. This is about 8 months late, you can check out my other posts here:

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Here are the rules:

  1. Personality plays no role what so ever.
  2. All appearances are based on whether I like them or not, but please feel free to state your top ten, top five, top 3, top, whatever. The more opinions the better.
  3. Characters should be kind of unique. This pretty much eliminates Zaraki Kenpachi or any other Bleach captain, as they all have a similar uniform (they do look cool though). There are very few characters left if you obey this rule.
  4. If someone has big tits or something like that, they don’t count. fanservice plays no part.

Okay, so believe it or not, I do actually like art. In fact, if I were to hazard a guess, I’d say that one of the more appealing aspects of anime would have to be the artistic qualities that are given to the characters. Therefore, here is the list.

Onward:

Top Ten

I Have No Top Ten. In fact, during the length of time between this post and my last coolest character post, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen about 393 more cool characters that aren’t on any of these lists.

Alucard – Hellsing

Alucard is a bad ass, and look like one too. At first glance, you might think that his long hair and long red overcoat are kind of bland. Maybe his awesome huge gun has been seen in many other anime as well. But this dude can turn into darkness. He’s fucking awesome.

Re-L Mayer – Ergo Proxy

She’s got a bit of that gothic/emo look going on, which is a look that can either look really really really really gay, or pretty hot. In this case, I would fuck the shit out of Re-L Mayer. She’s a bad ass awesome looking blue eye-shadow wearing bitch.

Afro – Afro Samurai

Any character with an afro is automatically awesome. Any character with an afro and a samurai sword voiced by Samuel L Jackson is too awesome to not be on this list. Just look at that afro. It’s immaculate.

Sesshomaru – InuYasha

Bad characters have flaws. Awesome ones have claws. Sesshomaru has awesom hair, one arm (for a majority of the show at least), and a tail that stays fucking awesome looking. And, yes, he has claws. Just look at him. Awesome character design. his tail makes him look like a Pimp or something.

Demon Inuyasha – InuYasha

Bad characters have flaws. Awesome characters have….wait, didn’t I just say this? Like his older half brother, Inuyasha kicks ass when he’s in demon form. I mean, look at that shit. The red eyes, the sharper fangs/claws, he’s just the epitome of bad ass awesome. Blood on hands is always a good thing.

Martel – Fullmetal Alchemist

I’m pretty sure I already talked about Martel in detail, but still, she warrants another look. She’s the coolest looking character in FMA. I would totally nail the shit out of her.

Ginno – Afro Samurai

Who said Teddy bears couldn’t be awesome? The designers got it right in this series with almost every character they had. How can you make a character more bad ass? Put something that is totally NOT bad ass on them. Compare Ginno with his Teddy bead head to Ginno without it. Which is more bad ass? Yeah, I thought so. Considering how awesome he looks with the double katana and teddy bear head, I’m surprised how IMPOSSIBLE it is to find a picture of him.

The entire cast of Hyakko

Hyakko was a show about nothing. It was stupid. I loved it. I wish there were more episodes. After struggling through the first 3 episodes, I steamrolled through the rest of the series, and the entire time, my main thought was, “These school uniforms are AWesOME.” Orange and black never looked so cool. And if you look at the above picture, you can see how, even though all of the characters had the same uniform, they all looked completely different. I loved how every character was unique. I want more Hyakko (animated version).

Kaori Kanzaki – To Aru Majutsu no Index

One of the top ten coolest looking characters ever (maybe, if I had a top ten) simply because she has some bad ass pants. I’ve never seen pants like the ones that she wears. But that’s not the only reason why she’s cool looking… First of all, she’s a babe. I mean, look at her. Huge tits, perfect figure…pretty much completely unrealistic, which is fine. Shirt tied stylishly to emphasize her tits? I’m great with it. But her jeans are a style that I wish I saw more of on the streets. one leg long, one leg cut into short jean shorts. Awesome. Not to mention the samurai sword.

Flame Shana – Shakugan no Shana

You think I’d leave out Shana, aka one of my favorite female characters ever? Nope. I’m the best. Anyway, just look at her awesome fiery hair. She looks awesome. Voiced by Rie Kugimiya, the best seiyuu ever. Enough said.

Saber – fate/stay night

Saber’s mean eyes look great….anyway, just look at her. She looks awesome with that sword. Not much more to say. She’s a babe. I’d do her.

Revy – Black Lagoon

If I were to make a Black Lagoon movie live action, this girl would be the perfect Revy. Just look at her bad ass sneer.

No review needed for this one. Bad ass all over double gunz gloves cig burnin….just awesome. Best dressed female ever.

Karas Girl – Karas

Have you ever seen a cooler looking character? I want those goggles.

I’ll maybe make more posts like this if I ever see some more cool characters. Thank God I finally followed through and completed this one though. I feel great. Also ran 8 miles today pretty well. I’m gettin back in shape baby!

Eye’ve Hit a SNAG [Vs. World]

“Good luck to my opponent my ass. I will verbally abuse my opponent, even if it costs my blog a loss in the [second] round.”

- Old Klingon Proverb.

…..well……it would be an old klingon proverb if oballer was an old klingon, but he isn’t, so it’s actually not an old klingon proverb…..it’s more of a quote……like……..just a normal……quote.

Okay well after getting a bye in the first round, I find myself facing off against SNAG Vs. World in the second round of the fabled Aniblog Tournament. And as Coolio once said:

“Awwww here it goes!!!

I was GOING to talk smack, but now? Well, I just don’t think that I should do it. Call me a pussy or whatever, but guys, it really just isn’t right. This is a good natured little tourney, and should be respected.

So, the first thing I noticed about SNAG Vs. World was his fantastic about page, which you could get to by simply clicking the link on the top of his blog, below the header:

Apparently SNAG Vs. World is run by some blogger named Not Found. I found the information refreshing to say the least. It’s hard to find a good about page these days, especially when there’s a lot of bloggers out there who have about pages that don’t work because of things like requested URL problems. You know what really grinds my gears about about pages, is when the author never specifies whether or not he/she is a make or a female. It makes it really hard to talk about them, because you can never say, “He did this” or “She did that.” I’m glad to see that we all know Not Found’s gender (he’s an error document). Good thing SNAG Vs. World is up to date with his bio (there’s another about link on the side, but you shouldn’t use that one, I think it’s broken, it keeps saying that Not Found’s name is Jacob, when we all know that Jacob is a character from the awesome tv show, LOST).

Another thing I noticed was that the few posts I read on the front page were pretty good. I wanted to check out some more of his posts from his past, and this site is so easy to maneauver, all I had to do was click on the archives page, which was on the top, below the header. In fact, it’s right next to the about tag:

At first, you might think that this is simply the same about page I just showed you, but if you look closely, the URL says “achives” at the end, as opposed to “about”. I found this very helpful, as I was able to navigate though all zero of the posts that he had in his archives, which didn’t exist anywhere.

Another thing that caught my eye was his linkage to Danny Choo on his sidebar. We all love Danny Choo, and I’m pretty sure that by now, almost all of us agree that his pictures of ramen and random pointless bullshit inspire thousands of minds all over the world. Who can’t link to this guy? There’s so much to gain! I know some people who have gotten 2 and even 3 hits from linking to his site via showing HIS feed on YOUR blog. It’s a no lose situation, and definitely doesn’t mean that YOU ARE DANNY CHOO’S BITCH. He definitely cares about your blog, and posts comments on it routinely, all because you linked to his feed. You are clearly not GETTING USED. Makes me wonder why I still haven’t linked to Danny Choo’s RSS feed yet…

Not Found is clearly been excited about this tourney for a while. His posts about the tourney have said enough about his excitement (I would link you, but he hides them well). Clearly with this comment from 2D, he has solidified himself as a winner in already. At first appearance, it would seem as though HE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW HE’S IN THIS TOURNAMENT, but this, my friends, is a tactic. By creating the mood that says, “I don’t even care about this tournament,” he seems like a bad ass, which should garner lots of votes. How can I beat this?

The we come to the content of the posts. Pretty damn good. Jason covers a wide variety of subjects, ranging from goth topics, to goth topics, and believe it or not, he even covers goth topics. Not only that, but the whole general layout in which the posts are presented just adds spice to everything he writes. I mean, white background with words? I should just quit right now! Just look at his header, and try and tell me with a straight face that that isn’t the most EXCITING and AWE INSPIRED header you’ve ever seen. Try it. You can’t do it.

Of course, even with all of this greatness, I still think that Eye Sedso is better, so vote for me, a champion amongst mediocre, a men among boys, a hot air balloon among those balloons that you can buy at the store with the sticks attached that say something like “Happy Birthday Durr” (I hate those balloons). I could tell you to vote for everyone, but that’s dumb, I want you to vote for me.

Summer 2010: There Goes My Social Life

So I was stalking klux’s facebook (and her post too I guess), and saw that Chartfag threw up his summer list of anime. I saw it, and promptly pooped. I am SOOOO pumped for some of these titles.

I’m gonna start this off and say that the first name on the list is the one I’m most excited about.

High School of the Dead


I’ve been waiting patiently for this for a while. I was originally going to start the manga ages ago, but then I heard that an anime was being announced. Pretty much, this anime has everything I like:

  • Death
  • Blood
  • Zombies (thinking Sankarea)
  • Crazy shit happening in a school
  • Nurses

I have never really seen a lot of zombie related stuff in anime to be honest, so this should kick ass. I’ve also only heard good things about the manga, so I’m pretty excited to see how this turns out. I hope there’s a lot of blood. Also, I just watched Zombieland, and loved it, so I’m now even more pumped up for this. Also, I just read the first couple pages, and now I’m even more pumped.

Excitement Level: 9/10

Seikimatsu Occult Gakuin

The third installment in Tokyo TV’s Anime no Chikara project? What were the first two? I’ll watch them all. This could be good, it could be bad. Who knows. The picture tells me that there could be some humor in it.

Excitement Level: 7/10

Sengoku Basara II

Well, I hope it’s better than the first one, which started off awesome, but then just became bland. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t especially good. It was kind of just….there. Word is there’s a new director, so hopefully that does something for this. I’ll admit that raises my interest in this a bit.

Excitement Level: 6/10

Shi Ki

“Bizarre, inexplicable deaths.”

Excitement Level: 9/10

Kuroshitsuji 2

Never saw the first one. Anyone know if it was good? Should I see it?

Excitement Level: N/A

Nurarihyon no Mago

That person reminds me of an InuYasha character. Also, any character with white hair and a sword has to kick ass. Three parts human, one part demon? Sounds a lot like Inuyasha, who’s half and half. All we need now is a schoolgirl with huge tits to come in and start shooting arrows.

Excitement Level: 8/10

Tono to Issho

My inspiration for watching this is a big piece of poop. Not watching this unless it get’s good reviews.

Excitement Level: 1/10

The Legend of the Legendary Heroes

Judging by the RETARDED title, this show better be filled with lots of stupid, slapstick comedy, in which case it would be awesome. However, I’m pretty sure that it isn’t filled with stupid, slapstick comedy, so therefore, it’s most likely retarded in the bad way. What a waste of a hilariously dumb title. If it gets good reviews, I may consider.

Excitement Level: 3/10

EDIT: After reading scamp’s post, and actually seeing the trailer (which I forgot to post for these shows….usually I post all the trailers I can find), I have changed my rating as such:

Excitement Level: 9/10

Osaka Hamlet

I don’t know, is that what the animation is like? Pass.

Excitement Level: 1/10

Amagami SS


“Based on game……..focusing on the story of each heroine.”

They must be trying to make me stay away from this anime. Change “heroine” to “lesbian” and I’ll be interested.

Excitement Level: 1/10

Ookamisan o Shinchinin no Nakamatachi


The similarities to Toradora are everywhere, yet nowhere.

Excitement Level: 8/10

I’m not going to bother talking about Mistudomoe. Not watching.

Strike Witches 2

PUT ON SOME PANNNNNTTTTTTSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’ll be watching regardless.

Excitement Level: 7/10….higher if I found out that they’d be wearing some pants. I mean, when they fly, okay that makes sense with those huge boots….but you can wear pants around the base at least.

That’s it. I’m not interested at all in any of the other ones. If they get good reviews, then I’ll check em out, but the top three that I really care about and look forward to watching, in order, are:

  1. High School of the Dead
  2. Nurarhiyon no Mago
  3. Shi Ki

The first two are actually the only ones I REALLY care about. Can’t wait for this season to start.

Ken Akamatsu and His Cast

I should warn you….nah never mind, you’ll see for yourself.

Is it just me, or do all of Ken Akamatsu’s characters seem to be almost the same?

First of all. What’s up with that name? Ken. It’s just weird to me. I mean, think about it….Yuji, Saito, Yoichi, Katsu, Takamichi…..Ken. I just always felt like it never matched all of the other Japanese names…..anyway, this may sadly be the only real point I make in this post (that’s what I was going to warn you about).

I have been taking a break from Negima! (and pretty much everything these past two or three weeks) after I reached a good stopping point. I have just recently picked up Love Hina, which was an enjoyable anime, but IMO, had a rushed ending in the form of the OVAs. I’ve heard that the ending is a bit better manga (it’s the same result, but there’s more of it). After pausing on Mahou Sensei Negima, taking up Love Hina just re-affirmed what I had already thought:

Ken Akamatsu’s characters are all pretty much the same. Sometimes in appearance, sometimes in personality.

Part I: Specifics

Naru (Love Hina) = Asuna (Negi)

Naru from Love Hina and Asuna from Negima are pretty much exactly the same. Okay, so they don’t really look the same, but they both of them have the same body type (I’ll get into generalities later, which is really what the post is about), enjoy to punch, and have obsessions of men older than them. Speaking of….

Seta (Love Hina) = Takamichi (Negi)

The older men that Naru and Asuma have initial crushes on respectively. Both of them, I noticed, have distinct similarities. Not only do both of them smoke, but they both wear glasses, and have the same look that reminds me of a father figure looking down on the progress of a child. I mean, they even have the same smiles. (again, generalities, I’ll get into later).

Ayaka (Negi) = Mei Sakura (Negi)

Here’s two characters fromt he same manga that confused the shit out of me. I thought that Ayaka put on a nun’s uniform or something. I had no idea what was going on. In fact, I still don’t fully know who any of the nuns from Negima are or where they came from. I probably got confused because the hair is so similar.

I’m going to stop the comparisons there I think, because I could go all day comparing different characters. Although you could say that Suu (Love Hina) and Mei (Negima) look a bit the same because of their cheeks, and that Mizune (Love Hina) and Kaede (Negima) look the same because of their eyes. But the only thing really odd about this is that each manga only has one of each type of character.

Part II: Generalities

Well, so far I haven’t proved my point that his characters from his two manga are very similar. Here’s what I’ve said (or thought to myself) so far:

  • Both manga each have one samurai wielding girl. Just one for each.
  • Both manga each have one girl with closed eyes. Just one for each.
  • Both manga each have one girl with cheek marks (small ovals), and both of these girls are foreign. Just one for each (I think).
  • Both manga each have lead female characters that get angry at the make lead characters, and both female leads are capable of strong acts of violence. One of the only differences in personality, in fact, is that one is really smart, and one is really dumb. Otherwise their personalities are almost the same.
  • Both manga each have one dark skinned foreign girl. Just one for each (at least so far for me).

This post is sucking a lot more than I thought it would. So I’ll leave the generalities down to two pictures:

Love Hina


Mahou Sensei Negima!?

Okay, I will say this: All of the girls have the same body. Same waist, same tit size in proportion to height. Everything anatomically is pretty much always proportional and to me, almost stenciled? Does that make sense to anyone? Why the fuck is this in bold? Whatever, I’m not changing it. Bold it stays.

Akamatsu also (okay the bold is gone now for some reason) seems to have three different sets of eyes: the wide eye, the narrow eye, and the closed eye. To better illustrate what I’m trying to say, proceed to the next part.

Part III: Just Look At This One

Okay, one more picture that actually gets across my point. Click to enlarge:

Farther Reading

This posts SUCKED.

Even Farther Reading

Let it be known, I am an avid fan of Ken Akamatsu. I love the Negima series, and I’ve been pretty much obsessed with the Love Hina series for whatever reason. I’m not at all saying that his artistic talents are bad, nor are his methods. I’m just making an observation, and choosing to waste all of your time by making it a post. God knows I probably can’t draw these (only because I don’t have the patience).

Nintendo 64 Will Kick Your Ass

I found this deep in my drafts. I’m not even sure if I finished writing it, but I’m not going to check, I’m just going to put it up.

Holy shit! I was reading a nostalgic post indeed when I decided that I just couldn’t keep quiet anymore, and simply HAD to state a fact that I’m sure everyone already knows and agrees with, and that is that Nintendo 64 is the greatest gaming system ever created.

But what about PS3? Or XBox? Or Wii? Surly those are superior!

PS3 is awesome, but still not as good as N64, XBox SUCKS because it BREAKS DOWN ALWAYS. And don’t get me started on the wii.

So why does the N64 kick ass? Well, it’s mostly because of the incredibly awesome games, which I will get into in a bit. But just look at that picture. If you don’t have a full erection by now (or completely soaked cooch), then you should seek mental aid. Everything about this is just sexy. It’s obvious to me that a better looking controler has never been designed (holy shit I just completely bugged out. The words just got all wavy. That was weird. Anyway). Such a system core as good as this obviously does not exist. When I was young, this system was the shit. Anyone who was anyone had one. Now, it still is.

First of all, there’s no loading times. At all. None. I loved that shit, because I’m really impatient. It goes right from one thing to the next. That’s the shit right there.

Second, and most important, is the games.

The Games

If I didn't already have a perfectly good art project to use as a bowl, I would definitely use one of my now broken controllers!

The Games kicked serious ass. In fact, the first time I ever played Super Mario 64, I didn’t even play it, I watched my friend play it. You know what? I still had fun. Let me list off just a few games and tell you why they kick ass.

Doom 64: This was the first game I ever had. In actuality, I don’t even like this game. I can’t see shit because it’s too dark. Brighten the screen up you faggots! I mean seriously. How am I supposed to see if I can’t even tell what the fuck is going on? That being said, I played it the other day (even with brightness all the way up I can’t see shit), and the BFG is fucking ass-kickingly great. The game as a whole though is kind of dumb. You know what game doesn’t suck? Mirror’s Edge. You know why? For many reasons, one being everything is bright as fuck. But that game is for Xbox 360, which is a shitty gaming platform, and I’m still waiting for one of you to give me your Xbox 360. Seriously, send me one (email me at red_sox_glo@yahoo.com and I’ll even give you the shipping address).

Zelda: Ocarina of Time: This game kicks ass. Do I even have to get into this? It inspired a mix tape of epic proportions. The gameplay is great.

Goldeneye: No one can beat me. Except one kid I played, who literally shut everyone out. Of course, I still managed to make it close. (this kid was unreal. You didn’t even get enough time to get a gun, but that’s just because he memorized the Stacks level completely, and refused to play me on any other level, because he knew I would beat him, and he was a huge bitch. I could crush him if I played him again, but he was a douchbag anyway. I’d rather just kick his ass in real life. What a faggot. He’s probably dead now I hope). This is the best shooting game ever. Until Call of Duty was created, but no, call of duty is not for N64 either, and Goldeneye is actually still a better game.

Mario Kart 64: Oohhhhhhhhhhhhh shittttttttttttt. I got good at this game during Freshmen year of college (one of the best years in my life). At one point, I could do every cheat, from the Rainbow Road shortcut, to the shortcut on the bridge in the snowman level. But then I stopped playing and at this time, I’ve determined that the game cheats and my controller is always broken when I play.

Super Smash Brothers: Ohhhhhhhhhhhh shittttt. I’m better than Robert. We once played 99 lives and then the game froze at like….5 lives left. Or I just made that up. I would’ve won. In fact, I’m pretty sure I did win another time we did that, and then laughed in your GOD DAMN FACE. And yes, I lay as Pikachu, because I liked Pokemon when it came out, and then I got NASTTTYYY with him. I also like Luigi, but I want to get good with Samus now. They should make a Metroid live action movie with a hot girl playing Samus. Lucy Lui is hot, but wouldn’t be good for the part. That was random. Drew Barrymore is ugly.

NBA Hangtime:

These guys get SCREWED at the end of the first quarter. I actually laughed.

I want to play this now. I use all of these quotes when I fuck around at the park playing ball during summer. The best quote? ABDURRRRR RAHEEEMMM. And his shot, which is crazy in this game (it’s pretty much a line drive). For the record, in real life, I can dunk (no I can’t, but almost).

1080 Snowboarding: The only reason the sequal of this game sucked was because it wasn’t for N64 and they didn’t have Kensuke Kimachi or Deon Blaster, who were the two best players in the game. The makers of this game were racist, considering that they removed the only two people who weren’t white (they left an Asian girl in there, but let’s face it, no one’s going to be a girl in a sports game, because most people like to win).

All Star Baseball 2000: Here’s a game where I actually played a whole 9 inning game with my roomate (freshmen year) on ROOKIE. We were up till 4 AM, and the game lasted I think 5 hours or some crazy shit. He won 106-99, because he had last ups. This game is awesome.

Star Wars Racer: Does anyone actually call this game “Racer”? I never have. I call it podracing, and I kick ass. Suck a fat one Robert, I beat you at this game. I kick your ass like an Ass-Kicker. “Pizza….hee-hee” (either you get those quotes or you don’t).

There are many many many many more games that rule, but I’ll be here all day if I start naming them all. I didn’t even mention Super Mario 64 or Mario Tennis.

EDIT: This draft was old, and so now I’m just going to put it up, because I wrote so much that I don’t want to just delete it…..I guess I’ll ask a question or something to give this post a point…

What was you’re favorite N64 game?

Kiss X Sis: Manga vs Anime

Wonder why I’ve been posting less and less? It’s because I have finals and all that shit. Needless to say, after next Wednesday, I’ll be back.

Okay then. What brought this post on? I’ll tell you what: Me laughing my ass off from viewing Kiss x Sis.

That anime suxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx!!!!

No shit. It’s probably one of the worst anime ever made. It’s so bad that I’d rather plunge my fist into hot, skin-searing water than watch 5 minutes of that show. Even thinking about the 3 minutes of the OVA that I watched, and the 2 minutes of the first anime series episode make me cringe. Horrible anime.

So what the hell are you talking about?

Kiss x Sis, the manga, is God damn hilarious. Thing is, it didn’t start off funny at all. In fact, it started off quite poorly, which is to be expected with a plot as crappy as this one. It’s honestly a terrible plot. And after oballer once said something along the lines of: This is the crappiest shit I’ve ever watched (referring to the OVA which I had no initial aspirations to watch). After oballer’s thoughts with mine, I really didn’t think that I’d ever tune into an episode.

Then I became obsessed with manga for like…a week. I did nothing but read manga. I would click on random manga and read to my heart’s content. I was reading My Balls, which is very funny indeed, when I saw something on the bottom page of whatever site I was reading that said:

If you enjoy this manga, you might enjoy these!

“Okay,” I decided. I clicked a random manga, and was very disappointed to find out that I had clicked on Kiss x Sis. At first I decided that I was not going to bother myself to read it, but then I decided to check it out again. In all honesty, it wasn’t good. It wasn’t even funny. It was just stupid. But for some reason, I kept reading it, and as new characters got involved, and the scenarios kept becoming exponentially retarded, something happened. I started finding the chapters becoming increasingly funny.

How could this be? Why was I finding these chapters of this shitty shitty shitty shitty manga funny? The reason became clear with my reading of chapter 36: This anime was becoming more and more blatantly retarded, and filled with unexpected sexual humor (well, the sexual humor is expected, but the type and timing isn’t). If you know me, then you know that I love that shit. So why do I still hate the anime? Well. manga is usually better than anime, one could argue, but I feel like usually, it’s at least close. I mean, FMA is a BANGIN manga, and the current series, which follows the manga, might be one of my all time favorite anime I’ve seen when it raps up. I felt the same with InuYasha, Claymore, and even Gantz, until the crappy forced ending. The point I’m trying to make is, usually the anime isn’t that far off from the manga. Even if they completely change the show, like the first FMA series did, it can still be an awesome anime, like the first FMA series was. So why is Kiss x Sis so bad as an anime, when the manga is so awesome? I will delve.

The Manga

How to explain this. The series starts off with a kid who’s dad marries a women with two girls. They are all really young at this point, so they’re pretty much the same as normal brother and sisters. However, as they grow up, it’s clear that the sisters both want to fuck the shit out of Keita, the main male lead, and whats worse is that the parents actually want this to happen. To add some more cliche bullshit, both sisters are apparently really hot/popular in their schools, so of course all of the guys hate Keita now. So pretty much all of the early chapters are the girls coming on to Keita.

Sounds like a shit manga.

It really was. But then they added a few characters, which made things a lot better:

  • Miharu Mikuni: Shy glasses girl with huge tits who is actually just as perverted as the rest of the cast. She get’s more and more retarded (in a good way) as the series continues…..don’t want to spoil it.
  • Mikazuki Kiryu: She’s pretty much a loli, and a whore. She wants Keita, and isn’t afraid about being openly aggressive about it. I find her character annoying, as I don’t like lolis, but I mentioned her in order to mention her sister:
  • Yuzuki Kiryu: The funniest sensei, and arguably the deepest character so far, because she has so much fucked up shit going on in her head. She is Keita’s hot, virgin, fujoshi teacher who has a fetish for smell (and according to wikipedia…..samurai? I guess.), and at first she wants Keita to stop fucking his sisters, because let’s face it, that’s just weird (of course he isn’t really fucking them, although he might as well be at this point). Of course she ends up wanting to gobble his sausage. Mainly in the lates t manga episode.

Now, to explain what I mean when I talk abotu “retarded humor”, here are a few shots I took from the latest manga chapter (36).

Please tell me all girl's don't think like this.

I forgot another aspect of what I consider to be the humor of Kiss x Sis. Unexpected WTFedness. This excerpt pretty much came out of nowhere, or at least I didn

‘t see it coming. The odd specificness of it just makes me laugh.

"We Don't Have a Name"

This is funny for two reasons:

  1. They just walked in on Keita laying on the bed, with his topless teacher laying on top of him, apparently ready to fuck, and they simply asked her to take her time, while they wait downstairs.
  2. The quote, “We don’t have a name.” Breaking the 4th wall if you ask me, as they haven’t really said their names (to my k nowledge…I may have just missed it).

What is love? Perhaps it’s when your teacher lays on top of you while she’s pretty much naked, and then both of you use that scene to masturbate later. There’s no humor like masturbation humor. And look at their faces. If you were to replace the words, this ending is drawn in a way that looks like a respectable ending. For examp

le, if I make a few changes….

By "use tonight" they're talking about what they're going to use to masturbate to that night. Ie: each other.....how romantic.

I changed almost nothing about this, and suddenly it becomes an inspiring ending. It’s made to look like something inspir

ing, but then you read the words, and it’s just retarded (in a good way).

In conclusion (of this section at least) the manga is funny, mainly because of the retarded, perverted humor. It’s as though this manga is becoming a parody of itself.

The Anime

Still wonder why the anime sucks? Look no farther than this screenshot, which I stole from somewhere.

Bullshit blatant fanservice. The anime seems to focus less on comedy, and more on kisses. Prolonging and accenting the Chuuuuu~~~ and creating more fanservice than the manga has. Not interested in that unless there’s sufficient humor to go along with it, which there isn’t. I have nothing good to say about this anime. Pass.

The End

Farther Reading

The dubs for Negima……just horrible (NOT in a good way).

Well, the girls in the class actually aren’t dubbed to bad from what I’ve seen. But Negi and the ermine suck. So does Motsu kind of.

Remember When Chatmonchy Came To NYC?

Back in March? And I couldn’t go? Well, today I decided to look for the chords to Renai Spirits (which I’m STILL LOOKING FOR HINT HINT), and then I decided to look up their performance in NYC on youtube. Now, I am ANGRY.

LOOK AT WHAT I MISSED! BULLSHIT! I CAN ONLY HOPE THAT THEY COME BACK IN SUMMER, AND PLAY ON A SATURDAY, WHERE PEOPLE WON’T HAVE TO WORK OR GO TO SCHOOL THE NEXT DAY. FUCK I WANT TO GO SEE THEM. THIS SHIT WAS AWESOME AND I MISSED IT. I AM IN A FOUL MOOD.

Speaking of foul, I have an intramural softball game tonight. I think I have 3 homers this season, and I’m ready to get Team Jabooty started today with a called shot right off the bat. That’s right, I’m calling my shot now. Back to Chatmonchy…

Remember when I said that Chatmonchy was the best band ever? Well guess what? I’m still right, they kick ass. Proof being I can listen to their songs, have very little knowledge of what they’re talking about, and still listen to them non stop for a week, month, or half year straight.

UPDATE: I still can’t find these God damn chords!

ANOTHER, MORE IMPORTANT UPDATE: I think I figured it out by myself!

Hahaha, just kidding, here’s the real shit:

If you’re wondering why it sucked:

  • I don’t play guitar. I don’t even know the strings. Suck my dick.
  • I didn’t actually have notes/chords to look at, not that I’d understand notes anyway, seeing as I don’t know what strings are what.
  • The whole thing was pretty much guess and check.
  • I have a softball game in like, a little bit.

Well, I hope you enjoyed my boxers, which kick serious ass. If I pop my penis through the whole I can give Domo a nose! (I almost did it, but that would probably not be wise….in fact, I’m pretty sure this was not wise anyway……my dick….suck it).

I Will Do Whatever It Takes To Be Different, Even If That Means Writing A Really Long Title…Wait What? People Have Done That Already? Aww Man….Why Am I Reminded Of That Doug Episode? You Know, The One Where He Tries To Be Unique After Some Show Steals His Style, And It Ends Up Being Impossible?

In case you can’t tell by the title (I would think that it would be fairly obvious) this post will be about my thoughts on episodic blogs (duh). Just letting you know. Oh, and by the way, no, I’m not bashing any episodic blogs, in fact they’re all better than my shitty site, this is purely objectionable (is that the word I’m trying to think of? I’m really tired and probably really dumb too, so I’m not really sure…you know what I mean though.)

I do not like to “go with the crowd”. I am against “going with the flow”. I take a firm, yet supple stance on the banks opposite of “blending in”. Basically, I love uniqueness. Of course, this applies to real like as well as my ISSS, but mainly to my ISSS. This is one reason why episodic blogs turn me off like and old people having sex (I just put that image in your head. Don’t feel bad, I put it in mine too unfortunately). I feel like most episodic blogs are just more of the same. They take an episode, summarize it, and then say, “I thought this was cool. I didn’t like this as much. This person is a BITCH!”

Honestly? Really? Truly? Madly? Deeply? Savage Garden?  I don’t know about you, but I feel like if you’ve read one episodic blog, you’ve read…..well…….MOST of them. However, some episodic blogs can be very good.

Random Curiosity? Not one of them. Personally, I don’t like episodic blogs with 20948959389358739587395 screenshots:

This is what I would call, "And OVERLOAD"

Why don’t you just stream the show? I mean….why would you even waste time taking that many screenshots? What does it accomplish? I’d rather you take a select few screenshots of the things you found most important, most funny, most whatever, and put those up. That would be more interesting, and it would also give actual meaning to the screenshot you put up. I don’t know about anyone else, but when I see this many screenshots, I just skip right past them. I mean, it’s not like they’re saying anything about any specific screenshot. The author obviously put them there to show you that he or she does indeed know how to take a screenshot. Good for you kiddo. And sure, the quality is nice, but they serve no purpose. Sometimes, quality + quantity don’t make something good if there’s no purpose involved. Then again, I guess some people like it…I mean, 100 comments? Shit, my record is 70 (set in my last post), and almost half of them were me (before that my record was 69, which is a funny number if you’re in immature piece of shit like I am).

There are other people who aren’t even that opinionated. They don’t bother saying more than a few lines about what they thought about the show. That’s cool. Congratulations, you just wasted a whole shitload of my time, your time, and your dad’s sperm.

Why summarize an entire episode? Well, even I kind of do this, on the rare chance that I write an episodic post (like Hayate, which is a show that I feel I NEED to write episodics for, they’re so good). But we’ve all seen the episode already, so why do we need to read what we’ve already watched? I mean, I guess if the reader forgot most of the episode, it would make sense (but whoever watches an episode of anime only to forget the whole thing is kind of wasting his time watching anime). Instead of reviewing the whole episode piece by piece, why not instead focus on one specific part of the episode and then talk about that? That, to me, would make the post more interesting than just:

  • This happened
  • Then this happened
  • Then this happened
  • The episode came to a close

Thanks for telling me. I was there though. I watched the episode. I don’t want to know what happened because I already know.

I read blogs to see other people’s opinions on shows. I’m pretty sure most, if not all of you are the same way. I mean, why else would you read a blog? I guess if it had lots of porn or something on it…..I like to see interesting takes and new perspectives. Maybe someone talks about something from the episode that not many people noticed. Let me use an example, because examples are helpful.

When I do an episodic…..let me rephrase…..when I do an episodic that I actually am satisfied with, I’ll pick out one specific thing, a character, a moment, anything, and talk about that one thing. It could be a small thing that I noticed or maybe even the main theme of the episode. Anything.

Let’s take an episodic of Hayate no Gotoku! What do I talk about? In one review, my focal point was Jenny, the best random-ass character ever invented in the history of the world. In another one , I talked about Maria (I think I talked about Maria in every episode review), who is the best character in the show, and, if you ask me, is probably a real freak in the sack (honestly, I can see her getting down all the time…real kinky shit. She’s probably into all of that whipping shit and stuff. I’m not really into that yet though. Notice how I said, “yet”.). In fact, I’m surprised that that Superpost only got 7 comments. Maybe my awesome, better method of episode review is disliked by others? That’s silly. If that were the case, that would simply mean that all people are idiots.

I don’t know, maybe I just don’t read enough episodic posts. Maybe my mind is skewed from some weird accident that I suffered from as a child, and over time forgot. Or maybe I’m just too cool and make too much sense compared to everyone else. I can see how my supreme awesomeness might be intimidating.

PS: I have been behind in FMA, and I only recently caught up. What do I have to say?

MEET THE ROSS!!!!!!!

Best show ever. Lt. Ross is hot. So is a certain housewife. So is another specific Lt. So is pretty much every girl in the show, even the old lady used to kick ass and be hot.

Remember Middle School?

It has come to my attention that some people think that my job is to “act like a jerk, to be blunt, crude, swear a lot, and make it funny.” Although I generally succeed gracefully in all of these aspects, this certainly isn’t how I want to be known of or remembered by as an author. Maybe something about seeing it in writing made it really hit home. Jerk? Crude? Blunt? (wait…what’s so bad about being blunt?) These aren’t really kind things, and I’d like to change these thoughts of me. Therefore, I felt that I should work to clean up my act, and to start, I decided that talking about the innocent students of middle school should really change opinions of me….I’ll start writing this as soon as I finish filling out the checks to my usual charities……okay, done.

Three future whores in training....ARE WE REALLY ALLOWING THESE ACTS TO TAKE PLACE IN OUR SCHOOLS!? Say no to popsicles and all dick shaped foods (all the best kinds).

Middle school kids are dirty fucking brats. I honestly hate all of them. I even told my Refuse to Come Wack’s little, elementary school brother the other day that when he becomes a middle schooler, he’s really going to start to grind my gears, whether he think he is or not.

And for the record, no, I don’t hang around with kids more than half my age. You see, I was working on a grueling landscaping endeavor, which only a man of muscular fortitude like myself could possibly handle, when he came over to tell me and my good adult friend, Dean, that he hates Japanese people, because they all cheat. Needless to say, me and Dean were a bit shocked by this angry announcement from a child not even out of Elementary School. When we inquired how it was exactly, that Japanese people are cheaters, he replied by saying that they cheat because they “came up with a cheat thing for Pokemon, like a game shark.” When I told him that Japanese created Pokemon, as well as pretty much everything else on Earth, he said that he could’ve made Pokemon. I would love to talk about this conversation, because it’s literally the funniest thing ever. If you want to read the rest of this innocent, racist, funny conversation, then by all means, go to the bottom, I’ll talk about it more in depth. For now, back to the topic. A middle school student.

I’ve never seen a shittier life form in my life. People should be allowed to legally beat these beasts into submission just for sport, because most middle school children seem to think that the world revolves around them. They all think that they’re always right, and that they can get away with anything. Want some examples? I could give you millions, seeing as I work teen zone at the YMCA on Friday nights. Pretty much it’s a 3 hour event where a shit load of middle schooler come and act like assholes.

I don’t want a kid. Let me rephrase. I do, eventually want a kid. I would most likely spoil my kid, treat him or her like greatness, and transform into a huge pussy after having a kid. You should all pray I don’t have a kid anytime soon (doesn’t look likely anyway). But I think that during the times where this child of mine is in middle school, I’m going to DIE, or run away for a few years until my child has moved on to bigger and better things. I work as a supervisor to middle schoolers at a teen program once a week at my local YMCA, and even though I’m only there for 3 hours, it’s fucking hell. These dip-shit kids (all 200+ of them) act like they’re tough shit. And it doesn’t help that nowadays, we can’t even raise a voice at a child because we’ll get sued for “disrupting their psychological state of mind” or some over dramatic bullshit like that. Look, I fell down the stairs headfirst when I had only just learned to walk, But I got up like nothing even happened (I’ve got that on tape and it’s literally the funniest thing ever).

One time, a kid brought in a knife to this event. Another time, TWO kids brought in knives. There’s always a fight. Kid’s come in high and drunk. HIGH AND DRUNK. MIDDLE SCHOOL. WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE KIDS DOING WITH THEY’RE LIVES!? I may be a crude jerk, but even so, these kids are the FUTURE. What does this mean for us? I wasn’t both high and drunk at the same time until I was in college, and trust me, it’s a bad combination for a 21 year old, much less a 13 or 14 year old. What’s the NEXT generation going to be like? It seems to me that with every new generation comes worse and and worse behavior at earlier and earlier ages. Not coincidentally, in my opinion, people are becoming more and more politically correct. Stripping teachers and parents even of the ability to govern their students. It’s now abuse to spank you’re children. Really? That’s bullshit. It’s not abuse to lightly spank you’re child when  he’s bad. It’s not like you’re taking a bat and pummeling them into the ground. Besides, it’s not like parents feel good about spanking their children either. America is becoming a pussy, and it’s effecting our youth. Anyway, middle schoolers (WOW I got off track…and kind of serious too).

Suggested: Click and enlarge in a new tab/window. It's better to see their bratty faces.

Demons, all of them. Filthy brats with no sense of discipline. All of these kids are growing up to be bratty, self satisfying pussies. Right now I’m talking about the contents of this shitty nation. Ie: the shit. Let’s get this shit started:

RED: Look at the kid’s face. Look at his camo shirt. Look at his skater shoes and long hair. This kid thinks he’s a real rebel. He thinks he owns the world, and that he’s better than everyone. He’s the type of kid who will talk to you like he’s better than you, because he’s a real bad ass. He’s not just on equal footing with you, an elder, he’s above you. What a joke. Cut your hair, you’re not Tim Lincecum, he’s actually skilled at something. You’re just a waste of life. I bet you sit around all day playing video games. Go have your mom buy you a new toy you cunty piece of shit.

YELLOW: Look at you miss know it all. You’re just like Camo-Boy, except female. You just know everything, huh? You love to just boss everyone around like it’s nobody’s business. And if someone doesn’t like what you say?  TALK TO THE HAND! Say that shit to me and I’ll smack the shit out of you*. Chances are there’s a LOT of it.

* = I’d probably honestly give her a high five first…I mean, if someone puts their hand up at eye level, you kind of have to do it.

LIGHT BLUE: What the FUCK is this kid doing? The “call me” signal? That’s pretty cool, BRO. And look at your face BRO. No smiles there. God knows that face muscles are only for talking shit. In your case probably on a phone, far away from physical backlash. What a pussy. You need to get your ass beat badly.

Don’t you talk shit on a computer? Far away from physical backlash?

……uhhhhhh………………we’re moving on to pink.

PINK: This girl isn’t smiling either. You know why? She’s a snobby, stuck up bitch. She expects life to be served to her on a silver platter of gold*. Good thing it hasn’t been yet, because judging by the roundness of her face, she’d probably eat it. Whore.

* = a silver platter of gold? That makes no sense, but for some reason was hilarious to me.

BLUE: Well look at this. Is this what I think it is? A middle school GANG!? Holy shit, I guess times are tough for these kids. I mean, they need to form gangs to survive in their suburban schools with their peers who are dressed in all sorts of designer clothes. I hope these guys have bulletproof Hollister tees on. I can already tell that the kid with the backpack on thinks he’s tough shit. He really needs to be kicked in the throat.

GREEN: This girl is your typical “never shuts the fuck up” girl. Give the yapping a rest you cunt! I bet you talk all day about how Stacy and Brad might be together but they really aren’t but maybe they have an interest in each other but if they don’t you think that Brad’s kind of cute and that maybe you could date Brad but maybe you don’t want to but may- SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!! The teacher tells you to stop talking, and what do you do? First you agree to stop talking, and then you just keep talking!!! She sends you to the office and you’re all like, “I don’t care, I’m awesome and in middle school. Go ahead and do it!” Someone really needs to be punched in the mouth so that it has to be wired shut and that you can’t talk for weeks. Even you’re classmates are annoyed by you.

WHITE: These dudes are fuckin gay. Actually, I don’t have any problem with them being gay, but THIS IS A SCHOOL!!! NONE OF THIS SHIT!!! YOU’RE UNDERAGE!!! WHAT’S GOING ON IN THESE SCHOOLS TODAY!? The girl in the tye-dye is gay with the girl behind her (look at the other girl, she’s all up in Tye’Dye’s shit!), but they aren’t having a cuddle session in the middle of a class-picture. You guys will never live this down. Everyone knows not to come out of the closet until high school.

You can also spot, right between yellow and red, some Group-Girls. Aka, girls who go to the bathroom together, in order to put on makeup together and shit together. They also dance at dances together, go to the mall together (like yeahs!) eat together and they’ll grow up to be nothing more than 4 single friends who don’t get any action, and all live together with cats. Good luck with that.

God I hate middle schoolers. It’s sad that we were all like this one day. In fact, there’s only one genuinely awesome kid in this whole picture. Can you find him?

Continuation of the Japanese Racist Story

So my friends small child brother comes up to me and my adult friend Dean, while we are working on a manly landscaping project, and pretty much rips on Japanese people as hard as he can, calling them “cheaters for making a cheat device for GameBoy DS.” Obviously this boy is a child and doesn’t fully understand marketing strategies and what sells. First a little background on this child, who, for legality purposes, I will simply call “Thomas”. And Dean is being called “Dean” for the same reasons I guess. Not their really names probably.

Anyway, here’s a profile of Thomas that I made. Eye’s blocked for legality reasons. I forgot to block them.

Eye Sedso does not condone underage drinking or smoking, because Eye Sedso's author is a hypocrite.

“Thomas” is a child who is, for lack of a better word, OBSESSED WITH POKEMON. He doesn’t like anime, but we all know that being obsessed with Pokemon could lead down that path. Anyway, it baffles me how a kid so obsessed with something as Japanese as Pokemon could hate Japan and Japanese people? Personally, I love Japan and Japanese people, which isn’t really hard to see considering my loving personality and kind nature.

So me and Dean are mulching, digging, hauling, etc (well, Dean is just watering plants, he’s paying me to do this, so he’s not doing any real work). Thomas comes up to us and just starts ranting on Japan. He has his GameBoy DS in hand (I think it’s actually melded itself to his body at this point), with the latest Pokemon game loaded up. I this conversation started when I told him about the black and white versions which I knew were newest, I think from reading it on CSW a while back. He got all excited and started talking about Pokemon, got into Japan and how they cheat.

Me and Dean decided to have some fun with him. For these conversations, which probably won’t be funny to any of you, Anything Thomas says will be in Red and anything that either Dean or I say will be normal type. Dean started off:

“Digimon is way better than Pokemon.”

Thomas flared up: “NO! Pokemon are way better. Digimon are in computers (I have no idea what he’s talking about, I’ve never seen Digimon, nor will I ever)”

We made fun of him, and then the convo got serious when we asked,

“Do you have a girlfriend?”

“I have 3.” (kid’s a pimp somehow)

“What if there was a really hot Japanese girl in your class, and she really wanted to go out with you, and she would do anything for you, would you go out with her?”

“Yeah, to punch her in the face!”

Then we got to the economy.

“Do you like Pokemon?”

“Yeah, it’s the best.”

“But you hate the Japanese.”

“Yeah.”

“You realize that Japan made Pokemon?”

“Yeah, but they also made a cheat game for it, they’re cheaters.”

“But they made the idea of Pokemon.”

“So, I could make it.”

This went back and forth. Later, he came up with:

” I hate Japanese people.”

Yeah, but without the Japanese, you wouldn’t have any video games. There would be no Game Boy and no Nintendo.”

“I want to move to Japan.”

(“Wow, he changed his mind just like that?” I thought)”I thought you hated Japan?”

“I want to move there and then at night I can go around and kill people.”

(wtf!!!)”They all know karate though.”

“So? I can beat them all up.”

What the fuckkkkkkkkkk!??? I laughed my ass off. This kid is so small, and he was shitting on Japanese people, the Japanese economy, the Japanese industry, pretty much everything except Pokemon was shit on. I mean, the kid’s in 5th grade, so it’s not like he’s completely oblivious to everything. He knows what he’s saying. He obviously won’t actually do any of it (he said legally), and he honestly probably doesn’t mean any of it, but it was hilarious for me and Dean to go back and forth, making fun of Pokemon to get him mad, and giving him different scenerios about Japan to see his reactions. If you read this last section, you probably wasted your time, because it’s one of those, “You had to be there and actually know the kid” kind of things. Sorry for wasting your time. Actually I’m not. Goodbye.

I Guess I Should Add A Reaction to Janette’s Comments:

You said that my job is to “act like a jerk, to be blunt, crude, swear a lot, and make it funny.” Honestly. Yes, it kind of is my job, except I’m not getting paid, so it’s not a job. Wtf is up with that? Should I ask for some money or something? I’m pretty poor, and could always use an extra dollar.

The only thing I disagree with is being “blunt”. I still don’t see what’s wrong with being blunt just calling things as I see them? You were being blunt when you said that my job was yadda yadda yadda. Crude? I don’t know about crude. I feel like that would insinuate that I have no intellect, which I have plenty of. I could easily write a post that compares and contrasts two things, brings up new ideas, etc. In fact, usually I do, but I just don’t find that as fun as writing whatever I want to write. When I feel like writing an intelligent post, I’ll let you know. And even when I’m being abrasive, I feel like I still bring up decent points. Also, I’m only a jerk when I need to be, which is a lot. You would have to admit that I’m being quite cordial (at least I think I am) right now.
As for episodic blogs. Yeah, I don’t like them. Well, not totally true. I like some of them. TJ has kind of an episodic thing going on, and I like his blog a lot. Klux, one of my top five favorite blogs in the world, written by my wife who I’ve never really met or married IRL, but who is still my wife, is a bit episodic, but she writes in an awesome style (a bit like mine).

I guess in the end, it’s all up to the person and their general interests. Yi (or someone…I thought it was Yi, I can’t find the quote now though) said it best:

“It’s amazing to see that we all have our own cliques, even in the blogosphere”

As for the smack talk, it’s all in good fun. I might tell someone he’s a little pansy and his blog is such a huge piece of shit that it’s tearing a hole in the ozone layer. I might poke fun at my opponent and call him a Nazi. I might even accuse him of touching babies. But when it’s all said in done, we’re all in this together, moving forward for a better future. Think of the children! Peace on Earth!