Umineko no Naku Koro ni: I’m Just So Happy

Okay so, yea, I’ve been waiting for this show for a while and now it’s FINALLY HERE

Umineko no Naku Koro ni


Premise: Without giving away anything at all, let me instead list some things that are involved:

  1. An Island
  2. An entire family (aunts, uncles, etc.)
  3. An old dying rich guy.
  4. A witch? Yes, that is correct. A witch.

Although there wasn’t really anything yet that screamed out “murder show” all over the place, I can tell that it’s going to get crazy. You can tell that there is tension throughout the family for money.

Okay, that’s enough re-cap bullshit. It’s time now for things that actually matter (to me):

Rie Kugimiya

Oh hell yes. I haven’t seen anything with her in it since yesterday when I watched some Gintama. Or the day before when I watched the new FMA. Or the day before that when I watched the new Hayate no Gotoku. Needless to say, I needed some. Too bad she is playing a seemingly not-so-big part. She’s playing a servant:

Rie Kugimiya plays Shannon.

That’s still fine with me. However something is different about her character this time. Could it be her unusually soft, non-tsundere voice? Or wait.

That's it! You've hit the mark my dear boy!

Shannon’s got some big ass titties, which brings me to my next point (I guess, I’m kind of just making this up as I go, which is what I usually do):

The Importance of Boobs

We all know that boob size and humor is awesome in any genre of anything ever. I mean, it’s just great fun for everyone. This show gets that. Right off the bat, in the middle of introducing the characters, Battler (main character with brick-red hair) notices his cousin, Jessica. The first thing he does is:

Well, I doubt he's gay.

And of course he does the same thing with Shannon. This makes me happy, as I am big on boob humor, and boobs in general. Even the word “boob” has  a certain bouncy feel that is just great. Now we’re going to change direction, and talk about the opposite of boobs, which is


I’m writing a whole part dedicated to her. Why, because I think she’s awesome? No, because she’s an annoying stupid kid who annoys me. Let’s pull up some shots from a scene:

Nice teeth, demon child.

I feel your pain.

NOTE: If you could hear the sound that this kid was making, you would feel bad for Rose (the name of the mother in the second picture). It wasn’t really a cry. It wasn’t really a whine. It was kind of like a whine mixed with a siren and a cow (if that makes any sense). regardless, it was the most annoying sound I have ever heard (besides my alarm clock).

So yell fucking louder, you spoiled little brat.

Okay, so Rose told Maria to stop yelling, and what did Maria do? She looked at Rose, and then yelled even louder, in an even more annoying voice. I wanted to smack this girl. Rose asks her once more to stop it, this time using a bit more force in her voice, as well as crazy Higurashi eyes:

Reinfocement isn't working, you know what that means....

However, this doesn’t work, because Maria is a little brat, so she does something that made me say, “It’s about time!”

This isn't called "child abuse," it's called learning.


Get what you deserve!

TAKE THAT MARIA! Yes! Good parenting! 10 points! And look at that follow through! Good form! She sent Maria to the GROUND, BITCH! Then Battler, despite having a pretty damn cool name, goes and says something like this:

Pussy! God Damn Pussy!

Needless to say. I approve of Rose’s style. And no, she’s not being a crazy bitch mother, later she shows her appreciation of Maria, even though Maria is a stupid kid (she’s 9 years old, she should either act her age or get tested for mental deficiencies).

Well that’s all I really have to say (and I didn’t even touch on the witch, Beatrice, who is probably the most important aspect of the show). This show looks like it can’t be bad (I mean, there’s going to be lots of murder, and it’s like And Then There Were None with a twist). I am happy. Time to start Aoi Hana, a show about lesbians.


5 thoughts on “Umineko no Naku Koro ni: I’m Just So Happy

  1. I can tolerate uguu. I even grew to like nipaa. But Maria’s OOOUOUOOOOOOOUOUUUUUUUOUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOU goes too far. If I were Beatrice, I’d give Rose all the gold for smacking Maria down.

  2. Maria’s ‘~uu’ is actually an important device for later. Bear with the annoyance. But hey, at least loli-slap is uber cool.

    And I think that you know what will happen. All of them will be killed one by one including Shannon. Of course, that is the premise of the show. But I hope that there will be a person or two who will survive this predicament.

  3. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUu UUUuuuuu UUUuuuuuu!!! Rose shouldn’t get points for slapping the crazy loli, since slapping only made the wails worse. the correct solution was to put tape over her mouth.

  4. @ Baka-Raptor: If Maria ever makes that sound again, I just hope that Rose is there to slap the shit out of her, if not, someone else better step up.

    @ Simplybill: Th only way that Maria’s whine should b an important plot device is if it’s used in a scene where she starts whining, and then someone kills her. And I thought that the plot was a treasure hunt? You just ruined the whole show.

    @ TJ: The correct solution is to punt her off a cliff, that way, even if she’s still whining, at least she’ll be at the bottom of a cliff, and you won’t have to listen to her.

    • It is supposed to be a corpse hunt. That is the premise of the show. Just as how much I enjoyed Higurashi. Same makers of Higurashi. Besides, it is impossible for a treasure hunt to occur in this story that reeks of creepiness.

      At least Maria thinks that the missing rose is worth “uu”-ing enough.

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