One could say that it KICKS ass! (pun get it? get it? it’s a pun. I just made a joke and it was a pun. get it?)
First of all, the main character
That’s a HUUUUUUGE bitch! Holy shit! I’ve never come across a woman this large in size, size, and size! But that’s one of the things that seems good so far about this anime. I mean, if you’re going to have a female be a nasty street fighter, you can’t make her some loli girl, it’s just not realistic. But Maki is a girl who, based on sheer size and muscular fortitude alone, could probably mash any strong male like potatoes (get it? mashed? potatoes? mashed potatoes? the potatoes are mashed? they’re mashed potatoes, and I-I compared the men, to the potatoes…to…to the mashed potatokay I’ll stop doing this).
In fact, in this post, I’m not going to talk about the awesome OP and the awesome ED, or the other shit like that. I’m only going to talk about the size of this gargantuan Amazon Warrior-looking she-beast. For Halloween she paints herself green and goes as the Hulks bigger, older sister. Can you find a man anywhere with the penis thick enough to satisfy this woman’s assumably massive hatchet battle ax wound? I mean, forget length, her vaginal cavity could probably give Snow White and all of her seven dwarfs a great place to hide out from all sorts of witches and apples, and they could all have separate rooms too. I bet she has cable hooked up in that giant vagina of hers. She probably rents it out to people during holidays. Her family probably saves money by living out of her uterus instead of spending money on a house.
Most girls will go interracial if they want to fuck a bigger dong (like a black person). But Maki needs to go interspecies. Maki needs a penis the size of a great whale if she want to feel satisfaction. Not a great whale’s penis, I’m talking about an entire great whale. Maki’s vagina once held down a job as a holding tank for Shamoo the Whale. The pleasure that she got from it caused her to climax, and resulted in one of the largest tsunami’s ever recorded.
Penises come in all sorts of sizes. Of the biggest are those that are like, a foot long or some ridiculous shit (I’m kind of just guessing here). But is that enough? Fuck no. Not for Maki’s giant pussy. The world’s biggest feline is not a lion, it’s Maki’s pussy (that one sucked). Now I’m not going to tell you that my penis is around 6.5-7 inches when erect, because I don’t share that kind of information. But I will say that no matter how big a cock gets, it probably would never satisfy Maki’s vagina, which has been known to house the Goodyear blimp.
This girl is fucking huge. She’s like the Shaq of Japanese women. Is she even Japanese? I doubt it. If I were to guess ethnicity, I’d say 25% Nordic, 25% German, 5% Japanese, 5% Hungarian, and 40% Huge Bitch. I’m guessing that the only thing that can’t fit in her vagina are Mina’s obnoxiously huge tits:
Compared to Maki’s vagina, these tits aren’t anything special. I mean, that kind of surgery can be done over night (Ace Ventura, 1994). But a vagina as big a Maki’s? A bigger one does not exist. And yes, if you’re wondering, I will be referencing Curb Your Enthusiasm in a bit. But first more talk about Maki.
Besides the fact that her vagina serves as a bomb shelter able to house 200 people in case of a nuclear attack, the utter size of her body is something that can only be described as behemoth, and that short, red hair doesn’t help her look anymore sexy. If a guy actually falls in love with her during this show, he better be fucking huge or I’ll shit my pants. Actually, it would probably make sense to have a really short guy fall in love with her….I mean, then sex would be interesting. How would he go about getting her pregnant? I’ll tell you how.
Getting Maki Pregnant
Step 1: Buy a Map
Maki’s vagina is a vast labyrinth, and it’s incredibly easy to get lost. Also, it would be best to make this map waterproof. You’ll know why once you’re in there.
Step 2: Wear a Rubber
suit. Wear a rubber suit. It’s a vagina, and during moment of arousal, vaginas get wet. It’s a fact that Maki’s vagina can hold up to 700 gallons of vaginal secretion, and you don’t want to drown. You should probably bring a few oxygen tanks and some flashlights too.
Step 3: Bring Some Porn
You’re already inside the vagina. What are you going to fuck? You’re going to have to jerk off, and so porn or vivid imagination will be needed, unless you can somehow jerk off to the insides of a vagina you sick fuck.
Step 4: Semen. Lots of it.
God knows how big the egg that you’re gonna have to fertilize is going to be. It might eat you if you get too close, so save up a few gallons of frozen sperm over the course of….well….your life, and get ready to use it.
That’s about it. Hopefully, you’ve gotten Maki pregnant, and you never have to do this arduous task ever again. Personally, I would just adopt. Here’s a relevant video, then more Maki facts:
Here’s a story about large vaginas. A friend of mine in high school (and this is an actual true story) was getting freaky with this girl. She was a pretty short girl, but when he went to finger her he FELL IN TO HER VAGINA AND DIED! It’s a pretty rough story, but we’ve all gotten over it now. So back to facts about Maki’s vagina.
- Maki’s vagina has it’s own mailing address and post office.
- Maki’s vagina has handicap parking.
- Over 47% of Maki’s vagina remains unexplored.
- Maki’s vagina is home to the world’s largest dam.
- If you took every penis on the planet and lined them up then you could wrap the Earth twice. Likewise, Maki could fit Earth inside of her vagina twice.
- Maki’s vagina can sing.
- When vacationing out of country, Maki’s vagina needs a separate passport, but on the plus side, it can be used to store all luggage, so there are no bag fees!
- Like the Himilayas, Maki’s vagina increases by 2 inches each year. Unlike the Himilayas, Maki’s vagina must eat three square meals a day.
- A queef from Maki’s vagina was the cause of Hurrican Katrina.
- Maki’s vagina starred as the Sarlacc Pit in Star Wars: Return of the Jedi.
Okay I’m done. And I didn’t even talk about her giant tits.