Ode to the Nike Soccer Commercial

This post was inspired ENTIRELY by Jesus159159159. If he didn’t throw up that Elvis song on twitter, I wouldn’t have looked at a shitload of Elvis stuff on youtube, and wouldn’t have remembered the best song ever: Elvis vs JXL – A Little Less Conversation, which was the main song from the Cage Match Nike Commercial. Well you know what? All Nike Soccer Commericals kick ass (or used to anyway). Here they are, starting with one of my favorites:

Nike Mission

“It’s just a ball.”

“NO! It’s rounder!”

Best quote ever? I love this shit. Davids has sick braids/glasses. He was the man. I remember him on Juventus, and when me and my friends would play soccer, we’d have to be someone, my friend would be Del Piero, and I’d be Davids (actually, I’d usually be Nedved, because Davids is black and I am whiter than Denny Blaze [link inspired by Refuse to Come Wack]).

Nike Airport

God this was awesome. The music! THE MUSIC! Who is it you ask?

Mas que nada by Tamba Trio (but these guys did it first unless I’m retarded)…. Anyway, did you see the guy at 54 seconds? Maybe he got the idea from seeing that ball, but he soon thereafter produces the SHIT OUT OF SHIT! (the Nike Cage Match Commercials….he’s the guy in them)

Nike Cage Match

This is where Elvis comes into play. This song was….well……I was obsessed with it.

Masterpiece. This created chaos. I mean, with this commercial, came the following:

  • The Chromer. The chrome ball used. Honestly, the ball was a bit heavy, but fuck me sideways if it wasn’t the coolest looking ball ever made.
  • I got a dvd (I think through Eurosport) that showed each individual match in full. It had all sorts of bonus stuff and was generally awesome.
  • Totti is a cheating Italian. That last goal was bullshit. I hate Totti.
  • Davids was sick in this video.
  • The Scorpion Kick. That goal that was scored at 1.24.

OH! I found a FULL cage match, that shows all of the DVD footage and cut scenes!

As I stated before, Totti is a cheating Italian bastard. I would love to link to a specific Pokey the Penguin comic right now, but I’m not looking through all of them to find the one I want….oh wait, yes I am:


I chose chose any comic….God, Pokey the Penguin is AWESOME. Anyway, that goal was bullshit, therefore……

Did you see that curve at 42 seconds! BLAMMMM!!!

Here’s one I haven’t yet seen:

Nike…err….House Match?

I liked that shit! Thinking back, I may have actually seen that, because I remember the dag. You like dags? Tha fuck’d I want a caravan ain’t gat no wheels!?

Nike Good vs Evil

“au revoir”….AWeEEESSOMmeMEEME!!

Nike Freestyle

I love it.

Well, that’s all I’m going to put up, because those are the ones from my youth that I’m most fond of. Damn this was a great post!


10 thoughts on “Ode to the Nike Soccer Commercial

  1. Aww man, the best one of all was the Elvis one inside the cage. Thanks to that, whenever somebody skilled their way around someone they always shouted ‘OLE’. Ah football is awesome~

    BTW if you’re a football fan then watch Giant Killing next season

  2. Surprisingly I actually hadn’t seen all of these…clearly The Mission is gooseness, but I think the airport one you posted was an extended version…I remember it but I don’t think I’d ever seen the full thing. Also, the version of Mas Que Nada in that commercial is probably an older one; Sergio Mendes took it (a really old Brasilian song) and tried to make an American Pop Equivalent which kicked ass (since American Pop wasn’t a literal piece of poop baked onto a sidewalk back in the 70s or whatever)

    Cage Match obviously = yesness.I had never seen the House Match but it was solid. Au Revoir = double yesness.

    If you’re a football fan, be ready to play football all week since I’m home.

  3. Oh well, a football post! For me, the unforgettable Nike commercials are the ones with the Brazilian National Team, aka Seleção. Ah, Ronaldo, Romario… Great times! Other awesome Mas Que Nada versions are the ones by Maria Creuza and Tamba Trio like u said,(I love both) but Sergio Mendez made that song famous, in the 60’s I think. The song is not his, anyway. ->Jorge Ben<-
    I have some basic requirements from this year's WORLD CUP. Last one was in 2006 and disappointed me. I hate classic finals like Italy-France or Germany-Italy or whatever. Boring as shit. Please God, no European teams in the final.
    1.Brazil must win (if they win they will have 6 WC wins, 2 more than any team out there. They have 5 now).
    2.Great referees. I hope they stop making experiments by using inexperienced arbiters from Africa or Asia. They can ruin games by trying too much and giving too many red and yellow cards.
    3.No South African horns (google for Vuvuzela). A total nightmare for anyone is trying to watch a game. But the official site says that they will allow them.
    We are all pumped in here for this WC. 4 years of waiting is so much, damn it!
    GREAT POST! I would write a more passionate comment, but it would be too long so I went with my BBC style.

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