Anime Powers #1: Ranma 1/2

I was eating some cookies, when all of a sudden, just like a Windows 7 commercial, it hit me.

“Doesn’t everyone want to know what I would do if I had so-and-so’s powers? Yes. Yes they do!”

There’s a SHITLOAD of different power ups, abilities, and pretty much superpowers that anime characters have. So what am I going to do? I’m going to go through everything from Espers to Espadas and bring out abilities from  every corner of the Anime universe and tell you why they rock, suck, and most importantly, what I would do if I had them. So here’s part one of this super-powered series of posts, starting with the ability that inspired it all…

Ranma 1/2: Gender Bending

These two are the same person, in case you are clueless to classic anime.

For the record, no, I still haven’t finished the anime series. Now, in case you aren’t familiar with Ranma 1/2, let me tell you:

“You are an idiot. Everyone who watches anime at least knows what this show is about”

It’s about Ranma Saotome, a black haired Martial Artist and real Man’s man (seen above) who, while training in China, the shittiest place ever, falls into a cursed spring (pond) and is forever ailed with the curse of the drowned girl. Pretty much, whenever he’s hit with cold water, he changes into a girl (seen above). Likewise, warm water reverses the effect.

There have been other cases of the gender bending ability (that dude/girl from To LOVE-Ru), but this is probably the most classic and well known form of the gender bender. Now, in Ranma 1/2, there are many different cursed springs, from the drowned cat to the drowned panda to the drowned Spring of the Drowned Yeti Holding an Eel and Crane while Riding an Ox. Technically, I should make this power shape shifting, but fuck that noise, I’m talking about gender bending.

What would I do, if I had the ability to change genders with a little H2O? To evaluate, I think it’s best to compare and contrast with Ranma Saotome.

Ranma’s biggest thing was that, even when he was a girl, he was still act like a dude. He didn’t give a shit about showing his breasts, and in fact, he used them as a weapon at times to fuck with the minds of dudes. I’d maybe be similar in the aspect that I would let my tits flop all over the place. I’d pretty much treat every part of my body as a joke. I mean, it would almost be like being in a costume with a mask. No one knows who is under the mask, so who cares what you do? I’m going to be Green Man for Halloween this year, and let me tell you, I’m going to go crazy.

Anyway, as for things I’d do? Well the first is pretty obvious. I think I talked about this once, but I’m not going to go and search for that post. I talked about masturbation, which I would immediately do, but I thought of something kind of funny….or interesting. It’s kind of a social experiment.

At a time when I was laying pipe with a girl (fucking a girl), I would wait until my dick was NOT in touching her, and I would make sure her eyes were shut, then I would change genders, and continue as if nothing happened. How long would it take before she realizes I’m now a girl? What would she do? So curious! Pretty much, I’d run amok. I’d especially steal everything. If I’m being chased? No big deal, I’d turn a corner and suddenly be a girl. In effect, I’d be able to disappear at any time. Oh how I would abuse these powers!

New MCR Single: The Only Hope For Me Is You

How did I find this? Because I’m a freak and have nothing better to do with my time then look for new leaked songs. And must I say….Holy Shit. This doesn’t even sound like My Chemical Romance at all. However, it has “HIT SINGLE” written all over it. Hopefully it actually gets played on the Radio Stations for once. God fucking Christ’s-shit of a station Radio 104.1 sucks massive bear cock.

IS ANYONE BELIEVING THIS RIGHT NOW!!!??? AWESOMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

Here’s the link to download illegally, which I did, because I plan on buying the album the second it comes out anyway:

http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/The+Only+Hope+for+Me+is+You

Na Na Na is still better IMO, but fuck, it’s MCR, I don’t not like any of their songs. This one has a completely different feel to it than any of their songs I’ve heard. I’m not sure how I feel about it, but it’s new so it’s awesome.

UPDATE: Song is awesome as FUCK.