There a lot of fuckers out there who love anime. That much is true. But when it comes to actually watching the shit, I’m in another league.
Sure, a lot of people watch a shit ton more anime than I do, but the difference between them and me is this: When you watch anime, a lot of you are so fuckin picky that it’s ridiculous. I mean come on, I’ve seen my share of anime, so I’m not completely naive to think that every anime is going to be perfect, but a lot of you find the smallest things wrong with some shows then seem to make up your mind that you’re not going to like a show no matter what.
That kind of sucks. I should pity you. Instead I’m going to insult you (not really though).
You can look at almost any show on my List, and I’ll probably say that I enjoyed it. Even if a lot of other people thought that the anime in question sucked balls. Not just any balls, but LARGE BALLS FILLED WITH VAST AMOUNTS OF SEMEN.
Before I get into the specifics as to why exactly I’m a better anime viewer than pretty much all of you, let me first tell you why you all suck.
1. This Show Is Too Cliche
Bitch, there’s your first problem. EVERY show is cliche if you dig deep enough. I bet I can even make Durarara, a pretty unique anime in it’s own respects, cliche. I hate when people use this arguments as to why a show is bad. For example, take the seemingly overused plot of:
“Girl with powers suddenly starts living with normal high school boy.”
I feel like there’s at least 2 shows with this plot every season, yet, who cares? While a lot of shows have similarities, they are also very different in their own rights. It’s not about how cliche a show is, it’s about the execution.
2. There’s not enough DEPTH
Since when do you need to know everything about a character’s past to enjoy a show? CAN’T YOU JUST ENJOY THE FUCKIN SHOW!?
I mean, don’t get me wrong, a show with a good amount of depth is always better, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that all shows that lack depth suck. Almost all shows have a background story for a character, but do you really need some elaborate scheming story riddled with odds and ends for a character to be interesting? You do? That sucks, you officially hate almost all anime.
3. Another Harem?
Everyone is apparently sick of harem anime, but I won’t not watch a show just because it’s a harem. Harem anime can still be great, even if they aren’t the most original plotline in the world. Asu no Yoichi was by no rights the first harem ever made. It came from somewhere deep in the pack, but it was still
one of the best. Cliche? Hell yeah. Another Harem? Hell yeah. Awesome as fuck? Hell yeah. A harem can still be good, and frankly, it can be nice to watch all of the girls who you don’t like, and hope for all of them to die.
4. Too longggggg
SHUT UP BITCH. Length can be a good thing too. Gintama? Over 200 episodes, and it’s still not enough. It may never be enough. Usually, a long show means a good show, except for shit like D. Gray Man, which sucked aweful shit. Length should never be an excuse. I still have to watch Legend of the Galactic Heroes. I’m not putting it off because it’s too long, I’m putting it off because it really doesn’t interest me.
5. Too Many Fillers
Naruto fillers sucked, so I can see this as being valid. D Gray Man seemed like all fillers, so it sucked too. InuYasha had a lot of fillers, but they were all FUCKING AWESOME.
6. There’s too much fanservice
It’s pretty easy to be able to tell what shows have fanservice and which ones don’t. Learn how to pick em pal.
These are what I feel are the top complaints made from all reviewers, the most prominent being “Cliche.”
So now on to me. What makes me better than you? Besides the fact that I’m a Legend with a fuckin ISSS instead of a blog, I also have the ability to enjoy every show ever (almost). How do I do this? Easy.
WHY I AM BETTER THAN YOU AT WATCHING ANIME
1. Flaws? What are those?
Unlike you silly nitpickers who work to find as much wrong with a show as possible, I usually just ignore everything wrong with a show and focus on the things I like. The end result? Every show seems a lot more enjoyable (ie better) to me than it does to everyone else. EXAMPLE:
Ookami-san most J.C. Staff anime. Some people seem to think that a lot of J.C. Staff’s plots are generic and dumb. Well fuck me sideways cuz I still like em all. I’m not going to pretend that I think the plots are all unique. They usually are pretty generic, but who cares if they’re good? Oh? You say they aren’t good? Then how come I like them? Go fuck yourselves, I’m always right.
I’ve said I like unique characters. Let’s take a show like Ookami-san. It was filled with great character with at least one thing unique to them. Ookami was a tsundere with some awesome cat boxing gloves (that had electricity). The main character was afraid of people/good with a slingshot. It had enough right there for me to enjoy the whole season.
That’s the thing right there. I don’t need much to enjoy a show. Just one or two tidbits. Dragon Crisis had a shit ton of flaws, and while I didn’t love the shit out of it, it’s true that I still enjoyed the show as a whole, when most people dismissed it as garbage/less than par. That’s cuz all I did was ignore the flaws, like Rie Kugimiya’s character, some of the weak plot, etc. I focused on the cool stuff, like Ryujis assent to
manliness non-pussiness acceptable-ness, some of the cooler characters, etc. Was the last episode corny and stupid as fuck? Yeah, but I simply decided to dismiss it. This ability allows me to enjoy a lot more than most people. I’m like a fucking superman of anime watching.
2. I don’t choose anime like a fuckhead.
When I’m going to decide to watch a show, I make sure I’m interested in at least one aspect of it. I’m not going to watch a show that doesn’t fit my criteria, because that would be fucking stupid. I watch shows that I know I’ll probably like. Occasionally I’ll get a dud (Venus Versus Virus), but for the most part, I’ll like any show that fits my genre circle. A few times I’ve chosen anime outside my circle, and that almost always ends with failure.
I remember when I watched Fruits Basket I almost killed myself. I recall Honey and Clover, which was the biggest waste of time ever. After I watched K-On, I changed my name to Harold Camping and predicted the end of days. But these are few and far between, and for the most part, I’m dishing out 5s to a lot of shows, and frankly, who wouldn’t like to love every show they watch?
I should’ve just made this post about people having problems with the “cliche,” because that’s really the main thing I wanted to talk about. People saying that a show is cliche is just so…….cliche.