If You Could Be One Anime Character, Who Would You Be?

After finishing Golden Boy and deciding that it was totally awesome (effective Nov. 17th or something), I realized that it would also be awesome to have Kintaro’s life. His lifestyle, his luck, and the interactions that he goes through in a short 6 episodes are all enviable to say the least.

Then the awesomeness of this show got me thinking, “Out of all of the characters that I’ve witnessed, a number well into the thousands, who would I like to be?”

Notice I say “be” and not “be like. “It’s a question asked so many times that I guess I thought I already answered it, but thinking back, I never really considered it. So after this, I had to think, and so, I thought.

I thought and I thought.

Afterwards, I came to the conclusion that I should think a little bit more, and so I did.

I thought a little bit more, and then, finally, I was good and ready to realize what character I wanted to be think even more. One can never do enough thinking, and I f-

Cut to the chase you moron. All you do is ramble. You still owe me a po-

Right. Now, before I tell you three people who still actually read this ISSS who that character is, let me let you know why. Most of the characters that I like the most have to qualify certain needs that I, as a sad boring human living in reality desire:

1. Powers

Some kind of power must be present in this character. That’s just how it is. My favorite characters usually have these types of things in place. InuYasha has all sorts of crazy powers from being a half demon with an awesome sword. Ed Elric can use alchemy. Even someone like Maki from Air Master has unrealistic levels of strength and agility, and an enormous vagina, which I can consider a power in itself. In fact, it doesn’t necessarily have to be a power based on the body. Something like an awesome weapon can be considered a power (such as a Gantz suit or weapon), and likewise, being great at strategic thinking (Lelouch, Light Yagami) can be a power, because fuck, I can’t really do that (I probably could). Either way, the idea is, if you decided that you want to be a character, then you take all of their abilities (even the bad ones), and since powers like these don’t exist in real life, it’s up to anime to quench the thirst to fly or beat the shit out of a 24 foot tall giant using long stretchy arms that, despite being made out of a soft substance, still somehow hurt really bad.

2. The World

The world in which a character lives in and how they fit into this world have a lot to do with how much I’d want to swap places with a given character. You don’t want to have awesome powers but then end up living in a world where you still pretty much suck compared to everyone else. Take Krillin (DBZ) for example. By our standards of reality, he would easily be the strongest person in the history of people on Earth. He can shoot energy blasts out of his hands for God’s sake and it’s not like you see our troops using distructo-disks in Iraq do you? However, compared to pretty much anyone else in DBZ, he’s kind of a chump. Sure, in the Garlic Junior Saga, he dressed like a pimp, but other than that, he’s a bitch.

So a character’s place in their world has something to do with who I’d choose, so pretty much that means I’d want to take the strongest, or main character of a given show, right? Not necessarily. The example I cited (Krillin) demonstrates a character’s situation where he pretty much sucks, but to no fault of his own. Krillin really can’t improve anymore than he already has. He can’t get much stronger. He’s still a human. Meanwhile, he is surrounded by all sorts of crazy super saiyans, who never lose their powers and are super strong and pretty much live forever. He has limits. They don’t. He’s stuck where he is. That being said, he still gets to put his dick in 18’s ass every night, so it’s not like it’s all bad, because he’s a foxy babe. Take One Piece for example. Luffy is clearly the strongest and has awesome powers, but I fucking love swords, so I’d rather be Zoro. Plus he’s either sleeping or drinking, and I love doing those things too (I did not pick him though).

You see, some characters, while not the strongest, can make themselves strong and persevere in spite of this fact. Take Inuyasha for example. He’s a half demon. He’s not the strongest person in the world, but he has powers, and, mainly because of his weapon, he can improve his powers throughout his life, and improve his standing. Not only that, but while he might not be the strongest, the people around him provide him with ways to beat enemies that are much stronger than anything he could beat alone. In other words, he might not be the strongest, but he can hold his own, no matter the opponent. If Krillin tries to face any crazy super saiyans, he’s gonna get the shit kicked out of him. It’s not good to be a character with no weaknesses, it’s just not as fun.

There’s many other things that go into a situation, such as what girls are doing around a character, and…..well…..yeah that’s pretty much the only other thing that concerns me.

Anyway, this posts is getting kind of long, so I’m going to cut to the chase. The characters who’s life I would most like to have is…..

Pidgey!


Yeah right. What a dumb pokemon, it’s just a normal fucking bird. If someone tried to fight me with a pidgey I could probably just throw a rock and kill it. It’s just a bird. Who in their right mind would want to be a Pidgey (I have a pidgey in my latest pokemon exploit, so I’m kind of a hypocrite here). No, no, no. My choice is a character whom I had always wanted to be. But first, I’m going to explain a bit [more].

The Top Tier

Before I get to my top three shows from which I’d want to be a character in, here are some other shows that I considered for my character swap:

One Piece


First of all, pirates are awesome. If you disagree, then burn in hell. Second of all, One Piece contains a rich plethora of powers to choose from. You can do anything from turning into a moose to using fire at will to being unable to tell anything but corny jokes (that’s a real power too, I looked it up, and I mention it in a post that is yet to be released). Yes ladies and gentlemen, One Piece has it all.

Inukami


I just love everything about this anime. Yoko is an awesome character and would make a great partner (for fighting), but mainly Keita (I actually remember their names!!!) is the one that intrigues me the most. His use of frog bombs truthfully isn’t anything special, but he’s pretty much allowed to run around naked. Worse case scenario, he ends up in jail only to be taken out later. No fine, no serious punishment. Now that’s a nice freedom to have, and should be considered a fantastic power.

Moyashimon


Ability to see particles? Awesome. Think of the financial gain that can be brought with seeing these tiny little guys….on second thought, this would probably make me never want to eat food again….forget this one, I don’t want this life.

xxxHOLiC


Watanuki is a bitch. He should go after Zashiki but he’s too stupid to realize how awesome she is.

Tenchi Muyo


Tenchi is a bitch. He should go after Ryoko but he’s too stupid to realize how awesome she is.

In the end, I narrowed my extensive amount of anime down to three shows. And here are my breakdowns of these top three anime:

Dragonball Z

Cosplay: It's not for everyone.

This has always been one of the shows that I would dream about. Like, you know how before you go to bed you create a story with an entire plot about yourself having some kind of power or something? And you know how you do this every night? Like, maybe you imagine yourself with abilities to fly and shoot distructo disks and stuff, and you imagine that you’re in a classroom, and suddenly crazy fighting ninjas come in and you fight them and beat them and win, and everyone is watching you thinking, “Woah! That kids all crazy and stuff! I’m so jealous of HIM!” You know how you usually do this? You don’t? Wtf is wrong with you, imagining shit all the time is awesome! Anyway, the awesome things you can do here are limitless. Shooting energy blasts, flying…CATCHING DRAGONBALLS!!! Dude even if you don’t have a power you want, you can wish for it to happen.

InuYasha

This was the show that took the place of the previously explained “pre-sleep-imaginations-dreams”. Instead of blasting someone with a Kamehameha, I was using claws to tear through them. So usually the bystanders in my dream were more afraid of me than in awe of me. Actually, they were both. It was much more fun, and there was more blood.

Fullmetal Alchemist

Cosplay: It is for other people.

There are so many things that you can do with alchemy, so many endless possibilities, that you can’t not consider this. You can do anything from controlling fire to moving the earth to fixing things to creating nuclear explosions (maybe. I’m not actually a nuclear physicist, so I’m not sure if nuclear explosions are really possible). So this is always a good choice. In the end, I wentwith the character that I thought I’d have the most fun with, basically, this is a character who’s build and world was tailor made to make me drool with envy.

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Inuyasha

All of that for this!? We already know that you like InuYasha! This was a waste of everyone’s time!

BAH! Inuyasha is awesome for several reasons, which I’m just going to list because it’s late and I wanna finish this draft now.

  • Inuyasha has awesome powers. He can use his blood as a weapon, he can use his claws as a weapon (fun!), he can turn into a demon with crazy ass power and use that as a weapon, and he can even use his weapon as a weapon! And, what’s more, is his weapon has powers, and can get more! Pretty much a perfect power package there!
  • The world Inuyasha lives in is feudal Japan. I fucking LOVE feudal Japan. Think of this. There’s no cars or cities, so there’s virtually no pollution (in comparison to today). Breathe that fresh air baby! Not only that, but Kagome can bring all sorts of new technologies back to feudal Japan and we can become famous inventors on the side. Money money money! But hey, if I ever don’t like it, I can just come to the future through the well. I’ve got the best of both worlds baby!
  • The crew. The crew is great. I can beat up on Shippo (which would be often), we have a funny monk (Miroku), a hot demon slayer (Sango) and a hot 15 year old who definitely isn’t 15 (Kagome). Honestly, Kagome’s more developed than some 20 year olds. There’s a thousand other characters too. As Inuyasha, I might try and get with Kagura before she dies.
  • Kagome can cook…..she can cook very well at that….I could end this right here.
  • Killing demons all day sounds like a fun job.
  • Inuyasha’s cloak can prevent injury.
  • Inuyasha can run fast as fuck, and jump far as fuck. I’d LOVE to not have to drive anymore.
  • Stabbed in the throat? No big deal.
  • I’d finally be able to see what Inuyasha looks like with a shaved head. What do those ears look like? Are they like…attached to the top of his head? Do they go all the way down to where his human ears should be? Must look weird.
  • Inuyasha can smell blood. Like literally. The only drawback to his great sense of smell is if I was in a room with Robert, and he farted, I’d probably actually die.
  • I’ll live a very long time.
  • Laws? What are they? Wait, who cares either way? I’m ten times stronger than any human!

Pretty much, he covers every aspect of a life that I’d want. The character of Inuyasha has a good world, a good standing in said world. Female prospects of good quality, fun and danger to be had at every corner, no laws, and a passage back to the current time if I ever want a vacation. I can still watch anime even! BAMMMMMMMMMMMMM!

Extra Shit

Well, I took about a week off, mainly because I’ve been hardcore balling out. I had two open bars on consecutive nights at event where I danced my ASS OFF, grinded with a MILF, and had a furocious good time, I got drunk some more, I had UN party (only people in my neighborhood) where I threw on a Kilt an argued over the importance of haggis, my birthday, Thanksgiving (on the same day! I’m 23 years old, and still ignoring reality!), and the week is still young. Tomorrow I’m going to get bombed and on Saturday I’m off to see the first inaugural game of the CT Whale, which is the closest thing I’m going to get to seeing my beloved Whalers reign on the ice again, although, I have heard from the former Hartford Whaler’s Dentist, that there is a 100% chance that the Whalers will return. Not only that, but the current owner of the CT Whale (AHL) is currently on pretty good terms with the NHL commissioner. They’ve gotten pretty friendly which is always a good thing. If the Whalers ever returned I’d go insane. Like, take the Red Sox winning the 04 World Series and ALCS combined, multiply it by….oh say……over 9000, and then you’ll get close to how ballistic I would go. Chances are, you wouldn’t be able to control me for weeks, and I wouldn’t get any sleep. I imagined the moment happening and I almost lost it. If the NHL starts losing revenue somehow then I think they might think about expanding, and a new stadium could be built (if the economy ever gets better which will be at least 5 years in my opinion). All I’m saying is it’s not impossible. Wow, I did not expect to write this much about the Whalers. Fuck. Here’s me in a kilt:

MON THEN YA SPECCY CUNT, SQUARE GO-LIKE!

Vampire Money. It’s an awesome song. Listen to it.

This post had a word count close to 2375.

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Manga Monday: I have a FETISH for KYOUKAI NO RINNE!

Fetish

Well, well, well, some troll told me to read this, and this was welcomed with agreement. And in case you’re wondering, no, this isn’t hentai. In fact, there isn’t even anything sex related really (aside from one chapter, but that’s only a small bit of nudity really, and we’re all mature anyway). I read Fetish, and enjoyed it for the most part. I mean, one chapter (chapter 2) was one of the coolest things I’ve ever read. In fact, a lot of it was really awesome. But some chapters just left me saying “huh?”. For example, there was one chapter, about a pregnant girl and a cab driver, really made no sense. I mean, it made sense, but it was kind of dumb. (it was also really short).  But this was the only chapter that I didn’t get. It still wasn’t horrible by any means, but the point of it was lost on me. SPOILERS: She abandoned her baby at the airport. That’s pretty fucked up, but so what? What next? It just ended. I felt cheated.

Final Grade – 5

Kyoukai no RINNE

Well, thanks to Mr. Black, I’ve finally found out that Kyoukai no Rinne is available for free, and legally, online. I didn’t know this before, because I am an idiot, and was simply waiting week after week for more Kyoukai no Rinne to be translated (this is a lie…I actually just forgot about it until now). Needless to say, when I went to said site, I wasn’t able to view chapters 17 and 18, because they had been taken down (boooo). However, I was able to view all of the other chapters from 19 onward, which was enjoyable.

For those of you who don’t know about this manga, I wrote a post on it a while back. It’s Rumiko Takahashi’s (Inuyasha, Urusei Yatsura) newest manga, and it’s awesome. I feel like it’s very similar to InuYasha in terms of characters and plot, and maybe that’s why I like it.

  • Both have female lead played by school girl.
  • Both have male lead played by someone who is from another world (in a sense).
  • Both have character who exorcises demons (one correctly, one completely wrong)
  • Both have small character (one an annoying fox-demon, one a cooler cat demon)
  • Both are done by Rumiko Takahashi.

Let me touch on one thing that all of Rumiko Takahashi’s manga have in common: The small character:

I feel like all of her works have one really small character. (clockwise from top right)

  1. Happosai – Ramna 1/2: One of the worst characters ever made. A short old perverted man who likes to steal underwear, and is the only reason why I am bored of Ranma 1/2.
  2. Shippo – InuYasha: A child fox demon who really doesn’t serve much of a purpose in InuYasha. I don’t mind him anymore.
  3. Ten – Urusei Yatsura: A mischivous cousin of Lum. Ten is actually kind of cool. I mean, he breathes fire.
  4. Rokumon – Kyoukai no Rinne: The best of the small characters. He’s actually kind of funny, and closer to a normal character. He’s actually cool. If you’re wondering what he is, he’s some kind of cat demon thing. Anyway, back to the manga:

Personally, I will always like InuYasha better, but that might be because the deeper plot hasn’t really developed yet in KnR (you get the sense that there’s going to be something a bit deeper…at least I do. I’m only at around chapter 28 though, so I’m no where near caught up (there’s like 40+ chapters now! I like that!)).

Like InuYasha, this manga is good, unlike Urusei Yatsura, which got really really boring after, ohhhh sayyy…100 chapters of bullshit (and likewise, Ranma 1/2 started getting boring around the same time, except in episodes, not chapters (because I didn’t read the manga, I watched am in the process of watching the anime)). at least KnR has subplots that last a few chapters, and contain good humor. I’ll actually laugh outloud at some things.

So what am I trying to say here? Basically, I want this show animated now. I mean…..in like….a year or two (now is too early). I’m sure eventually it will be animated, and basically what I’m trying to say is that I can’t wait. That’s………that’s it.

Franken Fran 27

That’s not pudding, it’s a dead dog.

The Art of the InuFiller

I’ve been coming up with some great ideas lately (well ideas anyway), and I’ve thought of another one which should get a lot of positive feedback (neither of either more likely, although personally, I think this post actually has good substance, but I’m probably just kidding myself). Take InuYasha. As almost any anime fan knows, this show is about a girl who falls into a time traveling well that sends her back to feudal Japan and demons and Naraku and the Shikon Shard and all that good fun stuff. But you know what I feel is under-appreciated about the show? The rare episodes where Kagome goes back to her time, and InuYasha always follows her, which creates a scene. That is the introduction to this post, but please, don’t leave just yet.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the recent season of InuYasha. Every show keeps me riveted, and afterward I’m filled with happy. But as I previously stated, the episodes where Kagome travels back to her time, and InuYasha inevitably shows up to get her, are mainly ignored (because they’re sort of fillers). Personally, I would love to see more of this:

What’s so exciting about this, right? Well, I think that I love these episodes the most (that’s right, I like them more than the regular episodes, even in the manga, always have), is that they’re different. Rumiko changes the entire setting and cast of the show (or manga really), and thus, InuYasha (and even Kagome considering how long she’s been away) have to adapt to the differences between this world and feudal Japan. Here, I’ll jot down just a few of the differences from the main story that these episodes have. And for your pleasure, I’ll use bullets:

  • Scenery – Instead of forests, there are buildings. Everything goes from organic to industrial. Crazy shit.
  • Technology – Bye bye horses, hello trains and cars. Inuyasha always mistakes bug moving things for demons, kind of like Sallah from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade:

No clip? Thought we had a clip. Oh well moving on

  • So after ripping off Family Guy:
  • Characters – Besides Kagome and Inuyasha, there are no other characters that are in both worlds, unless you count that ghost of the scabbard from the 3rd movie. Added we have Kagome’s family and friends.

I’ll use those three and leave it at that. At this point, the anime changes from and abnormal setting with one normal character (Kagome, except she has powers so she’s not that normal), to a normal setting with one abnormal character (Inuyasha, the only one with demon blood in this time period [to our knowledge]). Holy shit I haven’t even mentioned my idea yet (although you could probably guess what it’s going to be…and no, it’s not going to be something like, “200 more Inuyasha episodes!” Anyway, before I actually mention my idea, I want to elaborate on my last point of difference, and in fact I think I’ll do just that, seeing as this is my ISSS, which isn’t a blog, but actually is (not) a blog. On a side note, I saw that show Archer on FX. It was actually pretty funny. Anyway I saw like 2 episodes I think it got canceled. This also happened like, a month ago, I have no idea why I’m bringing i-

So the characters of Kagome’s world. Specifically, I’m going to ignore the family (because they all already know that Inuyasha is a half demon, and zone in on Kagome’s friends, who are all sluts. By the way, I find it odd that Kagome is trying to get into HIGH SCHOOL. I mean, you’re telling me that a tall, big breasted, able-bodied COOKING ELIGIBLE girl who is FIGHTING DEMONS no big deal and LOOKS like an 18 or 19-year-old is in MIDDLE SCHOOL? None of the middle school students look middle school like. Their bodies are all way too tall and developed. In fact, I don’t think that Japanese people even grow that tall over their entire life span (racial stereotype). My job entails me looking after middle school kids, and they’re all really fucking small. Like, up to my waist. One kid played me one on one in basketball. Big mistake on his part. I felt like a man blocking the shit out of every shot he took. (I let him score and stuff I’m not a douche bag. I actually let him get to game point, but I can’t let him win. I have enough pride to not want to get beaten by a middle schooler [even though I did anyway, later on…to my credit, we were playing one on one in a crowd of people, so he just hid behind people and took shots, the cheap asshole.])

I’m getting WAYYYYYYY fucking off topic, and you might be getting ready to click the “x” in the corner, but not yet. Here’s a picture:

So, Kagome’s friends, why are they so important? Well, I enjoy, more than anything, when a character with special needs….I mean abilities (well actually special needs could work, but it would just be politically incorrect, and we’d all feel like assholes as we laughed….holy shit I just got a funny Trigger Happy idea [see bottom]). Anyway, I love it when characters who have special abilities enter into a setting where no one else has abilities that are special. In this case, Inuyasha is half demon, is super strong, and can practically fly:

Now, what I really like is when the “special” character is supposed to hide his abilities for some reason, but then people find out, and become surprised/overwhelmed. This element of surprise is just AWESOME. I LOVE it.

So you just like surprise? Why are you so keen to InuYasha? Why not watch any show with surprise?

Let me elaborate. There are many types of surprise (which I will use numbers so as to not confuse you with the previous list):

  1. Strategy Surprise – Someone thinks they have the upper hand, when suddenly, BAM, the sides are turned with a superb plan.
  2. Plot Surprise – You think that one thing is happening, when suddenly, B-B…..B-BAM! A character who was dead is actually alive (or vice-versa), or an unexpected twist develops.
  3. Special Character Surprise – Aside from one or two characters, nobody know that this character has any special abilities, when suddenly, BA-BA BA-BA BAM! They realize he is actually a half demon youkai when he does something awesome, or merely shows his ears to people, in a way where they can tell that said ears are, in fact, real.

Why do I like this type of surprise/BAM moment more than say, Light exposing a plot/strategy surprise in Deathnote? Well, why do you like chocolate ice cream more than vanilla (for the record, strawberry is better than both, and chocolate ice cream sucks). Now, I can finally come to my idea and end this surprisingly long post:

I would love to see a short, 6 or so episode OVA of Inuyasha staying in Kagome’s word for an extended stay, dealing with different situations, and finally exposing himself to Kagome’s friends/school, and the related aftermath (how they all react). I mean, I almost feel cheated that no one (Kagome’s friends) ever found out that Inuyasha was a half demon. I probably looked forward to that more than the eventual conclusion of the Shikon jewel plot. And it never happened. Oh shit, did I just spoil that? Yes. Yes I did.

I mean, I’m not asking for like, a 26 episode long series or anything revolving around Inuyasha living in Kagome’s time or anything (although I’d love that too). Just a 6 episode OVA or something. Even 3 episodes would be fine.

.           .           .            .            .           .

~sigh~ I guess InuYasha just always leaves me wanting more. I wish Rumiko would write a new series about Inuyasha.

Other Acceptable OVAs (now that I think about it)

  • OVA about Sesshomaru and Sesshomaru only. Just him kicking ass. No Rin. No Jaken. Just Sesshomaru.

That’s it. Here’s my Trigger Happy idea: Create politically incorrect ringtones (like, “DURR I”M RETARDED” on repeat. Go into a crowd of people where it’s quiet (a church is best), and have it ring. Everyone will be offended. For the record, I do not condone making fun of the disabled. Unless I were disabled. Then you could make fun of me, I wouldn’t care.

Ode to the InuYasha Parody

I can’t hold back any longer. I just watched the latest episode of InuYasha: The Final Act (it was awesome, and reminded me why I love InuYasha), and immediately, I went to myspace video to check out these parodies, which everyone must surly know of by now.

Before I get into these, I must tell you. I use almost half the lines in these parodies in daily life. From classics such as “See ya later Larry!” to simpler ones like, “surprised expression?”. I either say or think these lines on an almost daily basis, and have been doing so since……errr…..2006? Without further adu, here are….you know, I have actually mentioned these once or twice on this ISSS, but never in this kind of detail….anyway, for real this time:

InuYasha Parodies

As made by some dude named Chris

InuYasha Parodies, as made by this guy, are funny as fuck, even though they make no sense (for the  most part) and are generally centered around randomness. The voices are dead on (especially the old dude). Okay, some of it might be kind of dumb. but I’ve watched these things so many times that….well……I know them all. Because they’re  myspace video, I can’t actually embed them (I mean, I tried, and these are what I got) just click on them. Below I listed my favorite quote from each. I really took this way too far.

EDIT: I found 5 of the parodies on youtube so those you can just watch.


Inuyasha Parody Clip 1: PORN STASH!

Inuyasha Parodies | MySpace Video

Best Quote: “Sweet, potato chip porn!”


Inuyasha Parody Clip 2: MIROKU’S BREAST EXAM!

Inuyasha Parodies | MySpace Video

Best Quote: “See ya later, Larry!”


Inuyasha Parody Clip 3: DJBOUTI POWER

Inuyasha Parodies | MySpace Video

Best Quote: “Yup……I’m starin at the ground.” (there’s actually a lot of good ones in this one)


Inuyasha Parody Clip 4: DNA

Inuyasha Parodies | MySpace Video

Best Quote: “Surprised expression?”


Inuyasha Parody Clip 5: INUMAN

Inuyasha Parodies | MySpace Video

Best Quote: “Kamekaze watermelon.”


Inuyasha Parody Clip 6: ROFFLECAKES!

Inuyasha Parodies | MySpace Video

Best Quote: “Heh, and the demon’s like, ‘Heh I’m going to kill you’, and I’m all like, ‘Heh, no you’re not.’ (laughter)”


Inuyasha Parody Clip 7: KEG PARTY!

Inuyasha Parodies | MySpace Video

Best Quote: “If Aunt Jemima wants to take us down…”


Inuyasha Parody Preview Clip 8: PREVIEW!

Inuyasha Parodies | MySpace Video

Best Quote: “Amazment!?”

That’s the best I can do for you. But yea, this is kind of a filler post. I don’t really need a filler post, since I post way too much as it is, but there you go.

Best Characters of Every Show I’ve Seen – Part IX: “I-J”

Okay, at the beginning that I would post a new “letter” everyday, ie, I would put up a new section of this massive post each day. I’m sure that yesterday night you canceled all of your plans, or maybe even made plans with friends, in anticipation of viewing my next post, and I’m sorry to say that I didn’t put it up. You must all be heartbroken, but give me a break, it was Saturday, you don’t expect me to stay in on a Saturday night, do you?

Anyway, today I’m back with a shitty new header (or updated header) that I designed in MS Paint, which is the only thing that I use to alter pictures, because I don’t have photoshop and wouldn’t use it anyway, because the shittyness that is MS Paint actually appeals to me and this site (which is proportionally shitty). It took me about 1 minute, and it looks like shit, but I like it, so it stays.

Anyway, here is “I-J” (there’s only one “J”), and it is quite extensive, due mainly to one character.

Ichigo 100% – Satsuki Kitaoji

The obvious choice.

Junpei, like most harem leads, seems to make the wrong choice in the end and not choose Satsuki. I mean, Satsuki is perfect (for me). She’s the aggressive, athletic type, who obviously loves sex (athletic girls love sex, I just decided that now). Not only that, but DDD boobs? Come on Junpei.

NOTE: Satsuki would just be my final choice. I would still have sex with all of them.

Ikkitousen – Ryomou Shimei

Arrest me.

Let me first say, that Ikki Tousen was cool in that it used people from Romance of the Three Kingdoms (Dynasty Warriors). All of the fighters had a spirit of a fighter in them (or something, and Ryomou had Lu Meng, who was pretty cool I guess…….in Dynasty Warriors at least. But after that, I liked her serious attitude, nasty fighting skills, eye patch (eye patches RULLLEEE) and French Maid costume. Yizzerrr.

Inukami! -Yoko

She's a kitsune.

I actually like Inukami a lot. It was funny, perverted, and contained a solid cast, not to mention an acceptable plot. That’s why it’s a top 20 for me. It took me a while to decide who I liked more, Yoko of Keita. Both have great seiyu (Yui Horie and Jun Fukuyama respectively), but in the end I went with Yoko, because, like Dokuro from Bokusatsu Tenshi Dokuro-chan, she helps move the plot along, and is a general reason for most of the perverted funniness. For example, she has the ability to teleport things, mainly, Keita’s clothes. Usually when this happens, a police officer happens to show up right on que, and bring him to jail. Keita then becomes known as a pervert, and in jail he meets other perverts, and generally the whole show is hilarious.

Yoko is also not actually an Inukami (dog God?) but a Kitsune (fox God?), and that is kind of cool I guess.

InuYasha – Inuyasha

Inuyasha!

Wow. This was difficult. Sesshomaru is undeniably the most bad ass in the series, but in terms of overall characters, I think I had to give it to Inuyasha, and here’s why.

First of all, Inuyasha’s personality is pretty much: “What the hell? I’ll beat your ass!” He’s not exactly a tactician when he fights, he kind of just tries to muscle his way through any problems. Want an example? Fuck…pick an episode, I’ll pick episode 6 of the brand new season (a season which, despite being awesome, is moving way to fast for my liking).

In said episode, the gang comes to a man-eating tree, which has had a shard implanted in it by Naraku, thus causing it to revive, despite the seal that Kikyou put on it 50 years earlier. Most of the gang is scratching their heads as to why Naraku would do such a thing. Inuyasha doesn’t give a fuck, he just starts flingin windscars at the thing.

Basically, Inuyasha is an impatient half-bad-ass, while Sesshomaru is a patient bad-ass. I am an impatient half bad-ass. I can relate to Inuyasha.

Also, he has three forms, his human form, his half-demon form (regular form), and his full out crazy-ass demon form (the best form). Why is this a good thing? It just is. Since Ilike his full demon form, I’ll talk about that first:

When Inuyasha is full demon, he loses himself completely, and just wants to kill everything, whether they’re friends of not. Episode 52 of the first series? AWESOME. I’ve got that shit memorized. Especially when he jumps up, slices the moth-demon to pieces, and then he lands and like….slides across the ground in a sick-ass pose. Just awesome. But that’s only one reason why Inuyasha edges out his half brother for the top spot, because let’s face, it, Sesshomaru does this kind of thing on a daily basis, except he doesn’t need poses. Therefore, why else should I choose Inuyasha?

Well, he’s got a lot of….ugh…..depth? Not really, but kind of. Got picked on as a kid, and instead of crying about it, he simply decided that all people (or demons) were stupid, and decided, “fuck em.” This is a good point of view for anyone to take, and one that I have personally taken. People suck. On the other end of the spectrum, we have Sesshomaru, the bad-ass FULL FLEDGED DEMON who was always treated as such. People, what we have here is kind of a case of a golden child, and a brown child.

Inuyasha (like me) is a brown child (brown is the color of shit). He was the less liked sibling (apparently), where as Sesshomaru was the golden child, who was treated as the proper one. Now, I say that this is kind of a case of brown/golden child, and not a classic case, because as we see, Inuyasha was given the Tessaiga, and Sesshomaru was given the Tensaiga, a sword who’s purpose was to be absorbed by the Tessaiga. So in the end, Inuyasha was given the better sword by his father. Am I talking in circles? Probably. What I was attempting to say was that Inuyasha had to struggle through life, and that’s sick.

Another reason is the aspect of REVENGE. I love revenge like nothing. Any movie or show about revenge is something that is almost guaranteed to make me happy. In this sense, Inyasha (along with pretty much everyone in the series) is out for revenge against Naraku, who, at one point of another, fucked each character over, except Shippo, who is a pointless character. Sesshomaru does not have any reason for revenge, he just has….I guess I’d call it a gripe against Sesshomaru, which is different then revenge, which is stronger. I feel like, revenge insinuates that someone you’re trying to get back at someone for something that you lost, while a gripe is similar to a verbal dispute, like, “Oh, you did that, to my wife, I’m sorry sir, but I’m going to break your leg.”

Shit, I can’t really put my finger on my I like Inuyasha more than Sesshomaru…..this whole thing was a jumbled mess of shit. I like them both, I guess in the end, I like Inuyasha more because:

  • He had it tougher than Sesshomaru
  • He’s got a big ass sword
  • He’s transforms cooly (not to say that Sesshomaru doesn’t)
  • He’s the fucking man

Ippatsu Kikimusume -Kunyan

Yup.

This girl gets into so many situations that are life or death…..and somehow she gets out of all of them…..this short (what was it, and OVA?) was awesome.

Jigoku Shoujo – Enma Ai

Not even a question

This one’s a no brainier. Or is it? Honestly, for a main character, Enma Ai doesn’t get much screen time, and when she does, it’s usually just her whisking some poor faggot away to hell. Or is it? I’m asking a lot of questions to confuse you. Let’s take a look at what makes her tick.

So she doesn’t say much…..when has that EVER been a bad thing? The great thing about Enma is that she doesn’t need words to express her self. It isn’t hard to see her general mood during certain times, like when she’s inspecting a customer’s situation. Am I going to use an example? Am I?

No. Watch the show if you want an example. (you fuckers should have watched it twice already anyway).

SIDE NOTES: I’m finally done with Pandora Hearts. I’m trying to catch up with all the shit I didn’t finish watching, like Bakemonogatari, Basquash, Umineko no Naku Koro ni, Umi Monogatari, Kanememo etc.

Basquash is good so far, but if it’s soo good, why am I so unmotivated to watch it. I’d rather watch Ranma at this point for some reason. In fact, I’m pretty unmotivated to watch any of these shows.

Kanememo sucks, but I’m slowly nearing the end of it’s shittyness. As far as a grade, it’s eying a 3 with hopeful eyes right now.

Umi Monogatari has it’s moments, but the soundtrack never changes, even when there’s momemts of suspense. The music just doesn’t match sometimes.

Nyan Koi to Phantom to Everything in Between

I’ll probably be the only one who thinks this post is brilliant. If you read it, you might get free beer!

…….

Now that I’ve got your attention with the empty gesture of free beer, here are some things I would like to say:

Nyan Koi!

I was only going to watch 2 shows week to week:

  1. InuYasha: The Final Act
  2. Natsu no Arashi 2

Well, so much for that. I couldn’t hold back…on….Nyan Koi!? Really!? Nyan Koi was the show that I couldn’t not watch? Well whatever, the show kicks ass.

Premise: From all the fall preview posts and shit like that, you should know the God damn premise already, if not, the internet is a vast source for information, you can find out the general plot somewhere I’m sure.

Basically, after two episodes of this show, I have learned that it actually has some pretty good humor. I like cats, or as the Mexicans call them “Los Gatos de Diablos”, so talking cats and a show with similar episodes doesn’t bother me at all. So far the best character is:

Style baby

This girl loves cats, but what’s more, she’s got some style. I like the hair, I like the makeup, she looks cool. If a girl looked like this in real life, I would probably date her maybe depending on how the transition of makeup on an anime girl to makeup on a real life girl went. I mean, things in anime tend to look a lot cooler looking than things in real life. Cosplay comes to mind, although I no longer have any problem with cosplay (I’ll still never do it).

So Kanoko looks cool, but she only wore her makeup for one fucking episode. That’s fucking gay. It looks like she won’t be wearing any anymore either, which is even more gay. However, she’s still the best character due to these factors:

  • Tomboy
  • Controlling
  • Cool Personality

Honestly, the only reason I like her as a character is the makeup and the tomboy persona. Whatever. This show is good so far.

checkmark

Fucking Check

Speaking of cool looking characters….

The Top Cool Looking Characters Ever List

I don’t know if anyone remembers that I was making a “list” of cool looking characters, but I was. I still am, but there’s a lot of writing and picture finding and unfortunately I’m very lazy. Maybe I’ll put out one more to round it off. Speaking of lists…

Longest Post in the History of Eye Sedso

What's this post going to be about? You'll find out if I ever finish it.

What's this post going to be about? You'll find out if I ever finish it.

I am currently writing a very long post. It was going to be cool, but unfortunately, I’m very lazy, and it’s taken me weeks just to get to the D’s, and since I have started this post, there have been a lot of similar posts coming out (which I won’t link to because it will give away what this post will be about), so now my idea isn’t going to seem original, which actually doesn’t effect me at all. I’m still writing it, and maybe I’ll finish it (it get’s longer by the day though. (you might be able to guess what it is, although that’s a large “might”.) Speaking of lists…

Worst Characters Ever List

That’s right, I’m devising a top ten worst characters list, and here’s what I know about it so far:

  • Reina will be on it.
  • Shippo will be on it.

Speaking of Shippo…

InuYasha: The Final Act – Episode 2+3

Have I mentioned that I'm really happy about InuYasha returning?

No, Kagura, you're going to die.

Fuckin Kagura died (again, since I already saw her die in the manga). Fuck that. Kagura is like, awesome. If she were a girl in real life, I would probably date her. Not maybe. It’s a sealed deal. However, I am yet to meet a girl with red eyes that isn’t an albino, so that’s not going to happen ever.

Episode 3? I’m not sure I even want to watch it (I do), because it’s about fucking Shippo. No I don’t mean that some one is going to penetrate Shippo, say, with a penis. I mean that the episode is about Shippo, and Shippo is fucking stupid. No, I don’t mean to say that Shippo is having sex with someone named stupid, I mean that Shippo is one of the worst characters ever.

Alphabet of Manliness: Extended Version

Longer, Harder

Buy this now.

Buy this now.

When I went to buy this today (a task which I should have done earlier). I became enraged because Borders didn’t have it. Therefore I traveled from Westfarms Mall in New Britain (or Newington or where ever) to Westfield Mall in Meriden, where Borders books doesn’t blow hard, and purchased this book for $16.50. It contains 30+ pages of material compared to the original, including the Numbers of Manliness. It’s funny, and since some ass hole still have my copy of the original, because he’s too cheap to buy his own, I enjoy my purchase.

Other Stupid Shit

Having a stack of burger wrapped in paper and sitting right in front of me as I help myself to their tasty goodness is one of my actual goals in life. The sad thing is, I could do it whenever I want, and haven't. I actually hate this girl because she's getting to do it. She stole my fucking dream.

Having a stack of burger wrapped in paper and sitting right in front of me as I help myself to their tasty goodness is one of my actual goals in life. The sad thing is, I could do it whenever I want, and haven't. I actually hate this girl because she's getting to do it. She stole my fucking dream.

Yes, I will have a review of Phantom down below, this way the title makes sense, because everything “in between” is literally “in between” Nyan Koi and Phantom. I rule.

Let’s see here. Here are some things that I still haven’t finished but probably should have finished by now, if not for the fact that, believe it or not, my life does not revolve around anime. I had a busy weekend getting hammered [delete] My whole life is one big doubt. What the fuck was I even- oh yea:

I should have finished by now:

  • Basquash! – good show, not watching for some reason EDIT: I have restarted watching it, and it’s still awesome.
  • Pandora Hearts – good show, not watching for some reason, started to yesterday though.
  • Bleach: Whatever that new movie is that I was going to watch tonight until I started writing this bullshit update/filler/juicy fruit post.
  • Tenchi Muyo – Wtf, I started it and was flying through. Then I stopped.
  • Ranma 1/2 – Honestly, it’s been about 7 years now since I started this.
  • Spice and Wolf II -good show, could finish in a day no problem.
  • Umi Monogatari – good show (from what I saw).

I should have started:

  • Natsu no Arashi 2 – Under-rated.
  • Zan Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei – This show kicks ass. Why the fuck have I only watched one episode?
  • Onani Master Kurosawa – This looks like it’s right up my alley, Wtf?
  • Bakemonogatari – I space out my Shinbo.

I have only just started:

  • Aria – got through half of the first episode, then Megavideo said “Ah Ah Ah! You didn’t say the magic word! Ah Ah Ah!” Then Samuel L Jackson got his arm bit off by a raptor. In fact, it was Baka-Raptor (I guess I might as well say that).

The New York Giants

Are the most disgusting team I have ever seen. If they get anything less than a Super Bowl victory this year I will be sadly disappointed. Although they have been playing teams like the Raiders (who they DESTROYED with their back up players).

The Boston Red Sox

I didn’t even watch the first game. I tortured myself into watching some of the second game. To tell you the truth I didn’t care about the playoffs at all this year. Usually it’s my favorite time of the year. Today I watched the game with general excitment. Then they put in Papelbon, and I almost just shut the tv off. I had been saying ALL YEAR. Trade Papelbon. He gets worse every year. He can’t control his fastball, everything is over the plate. You know what? Here are a list of things that I CALLED.

  • In game 2 Yanks vs Twins, I actually said, “Texiera is going to get to first somehow, and then A-Rod is going to hit a home run.” I have witnisses. Naturally it happened, andI wasn’t surprised in the least.
  • The Red Sox brought Rameriz in the relieve. I said, “he’s going to load the bases, and probably not get a single out.” Needless, to say, it happened.
  • The Red Sox Brought in Papelbon in the 8th [today] and I said, “Well, that’s the game, Papelbon SUCKS.’ Needless to say he allowed about 3 or 4 runs. I don’t know WHY Francona didn’t just leave Wagner in. He gave up a hit and a walk and then settled down. STUPID, BONEHEAD MANAGER.
  • “Carl Pavano will pitch good tonight. (I actually said this about the one game playoff as well). As usual, I was correct.

I can predict anything. I think that the Yankees will probably win everything, but the Angles have a fierce lineup. So anything can happen.

The Denver Nuggets

Are fucking awesome, and this year is the year that they beat the Lakers (even though the Lakers are even better than last year….somehow).

Speaking of Nuggets….

Phantom: Requiem for the Phantom

Shit, I used the only screen shot of this show that I took. I need a picture below the title though, so I’ll just pick a random one that I have lying around.

There's a reason I have this saved. I plan to use it. (aka, you'll see this again.)

There's a reason I have this saved. I plan to use it. (aka, you'll see this again.)

Yea, that works. Okay, review. Phantom, in my opinion, was…….PHANTastic! (*crickets*). What’s wrong with that? It’s a good pu- okay fine then.

Premise: Again, the internet is vast. I will tell you that it’s about assassins.

I almost dropped this show. Then I just let it sit and pile up interest (episodes) over time. Good thing I did. I was able to avoid a recession and didn’t end up laying this show off. Nor did I give it a bailout. It was a good show though.

I’d say the thing that stood out most for me was the story progression. Something was always happening that moved the story in a different direction, and even though there were a lot of corny moments, they really weren’t that bad. I really on;y had a few things that I didn’t like about it:

  1. Reiji died at the end. Now, I don’t mind the fact that he died. I expected one of them to die. But the way that they killed him off was so stupid and pointless that as far as I’m concerned, he’s alive and having sex with Eren (not Elen….Elen  isn’t as cool looking or sounding  as Eren, so her name, as far as I’m concerned, is Eren). I mean, I guy in a wagon randomly kills him in the last second of the last episode, after the entire plot is basically over. They just kind of did it to say that they did it. Retarded. Marks off for that.
  2. The soundtrack was repetitive to say the least. In one episode, it seemed like they played the song that was supposed to be for “building suspense” for what seemed like the entire 24 minutes. It became very stupid, and slightly annoying, to say the least. Incorrect answer, Phantom, Marks off.

Best Character?

Cal, because she somehow went from being the girl in the above burger picture, to being a girl with huge tits who kills people in only 2 years. probably physically impossible in real life. I mean, one day she’s like, 12, then next day she’s like 18.

Also, she was easily the best of the assassins. I mean, she had the watch, and when it stopped playing she would shoot the other person. Wasn’t that in a Clint Eastwood movie or something? If you know (Mike) then feel free to tell me.

Too bad she died too.

Overall, though, I thought that it was pretty cool. I liked how they incorporated the Phantom of the Opera (which I have never seen, and don’t plan to see any time soon) into the show with a similar name. Overall, I’d give it a

FINAL GRADE = 5 (I had it at a 5*, but after a few days, a 5 is better)

Bill used to be a Phantom, so he fought on an even keel with Phantom. They later had drinks.

Bill used to be a Phantom, so he fought on an even keel with Phantom. They later went out for drinks.

Wow this became a long ass post.